Either I’m becoming soft in my old age, or that scene from Glee with Kurt‘s dad was really powerful. Two days after the episode aired, the mere thought of his speech puts a lump in my throat and makes my eyes start to water. And it takes a lot for me to cry. I mean, hello! The entire theme of my adolescent life was repression.
Whether you love the show or hate it, we definitely recommend checking out this clip. The scene was briefly mentioned in our weekly Gleek Out, but we thought it was so good that it deserved its own post. Click through to find out what Burt Hummel (as played by Mike O’Malley) has to say when he catches Finn using the word “faggy” in front of his son…
– Dewitt
To watch the clip from the episode, follow the JUMP:
It really was about the best gay moment ever on TV. Burt over reacted a bit with Finn but I tell you you can almost see Finn’s heart breaking at the misunderstanding. Yes, he did attack Kurt but he has never behaved that way before. It was all around a great scene. And Finn learned his lesson. A lesson I am sure he will never forget thanks to his fondness for Kurt and his need to have Burt in his life. Great moment.
God, what is wrong with me? This is a TV show! LOL
Good job…nice
Ok.. It sends a message, but I guess it didn’t touch me like it did others. And that’s ok. I’m not ridiculing you for getting a lump in your throat. I just didn’t feel it the way you did. Maybe I need to watch the whole episode to get the context.
it did not touch me it was just sad crap boring !!!!!
why do the writers insist on making Kurt a victim? this scene was pathetic. the character is weak, further perpetuating the thought that if you’re gay, you need to be sheltered and taken care of. this is crap.
I agree. Does anyone think there are men who are gay without ‘gay’ being the precursor to their identity? yes, total crap.
Wow! So guys are saying what I was thinking! I just thought I’d try to be nice for a change. Now that ian has said it, I agree!
Wow, very powerful scene. i’m glad his dad put his foot down and spoke up for his son. It just takes one person to stand up sometimes to make a difference.
Plus that’s very disrespectful to come into someone’s home when they’ve offered you a place to stay and talk about their kid that way…
Looked with interest.
I thought it was a great scene, but think Finn should have said “i’m sorry” at least once.
Gosh, it totally got me choked up. I mean, Kurt isn’t totally innocent and I might even say that he was forcing himself onto Finn. It’s not okay that someone would use words like “faggy” in that context, but it totally made sense that Finn got reactive and kind of exploded.
What got me is that I just really wish that my father would do the same thing in that situation. I don’t believe he would. But gosh, it sure would be nice if dads were more often like these great characters such as Burt.
To Ian, Tam and Blah,
Maybe you guys are a lot younger than I am (52).
Maybe my generation has already done all of the heavy lifting for you.
Maybe you didn’t have to face any rejection from your family or friends or persecution from your religion.
Maybe our efforts made it just all too easy for you to be yourself without being killed on sight.
But I remember when having just one person stand up for me made all the difference in the world. It’s too hard to have to fight the world all by yourself. Sometimes, just one voice, one person can give you the strength to continue the fight.
It was a good scene and would be a life changer for ANY gay teenager to have his dad stand up for him in his own home.
I totally agree…that scene came out of
nowhere…never saw it coming…and it was
powerful, emotional, and made a huge impact
on a lot of us…great television.
I saw the episode and I kinda agree with Finn, the stuff looked faggy. He didn’t call Kurt a fag, faggot, or anything else disrespectful. I thought about it on the way to work the next day. Kurt needs a reality check if he thinks that anyone other than himself could have slept in that room. I think that most of us would have had a melt down. Saying all that, his father’s speech was riveting, more than what I would think most of our fathers would have given.
victim? of prejudice and ignorance.
when gay or fag or fruit are noun, verbs, adjectives to say excessive of anything, or just an attitude that says gay is weakness
and lame in any way – that’s ignorance.
No one says – that’s so Black?
What you thinking, Dago?
So because we dont’ have a visual clue to being gay gives people the right of intolerance?
Abuse is taking a persons humanity and using it in a negative way – any way.
Gay? If you didn’t know Stonewall and the years after that – you don’t know jack shit about how hard we found, lost, got up again and fought for a dignity. Not equality.
Just simple humanity.
Let me say it was the story of my experience and it broke my heart that it took so long to have the semantics and the intentions of the negativity of people explored to gay culture.
It’s a culture, it’s a lifestyle – and it’s been cutting edge since Sumerian times – Da Vinci as pansy? Try and say that?
Lets send it up for GLEE instead of gays to laugh with and at this show tackled the lack of tolerance and covert homophobia.
RIGHT ON. Loved it, hope to see more with other people and their sensitivities and aspects that make them unique.
Screw paying for the privilege of being gay or being mainstreamed or being tolerated.
THe more things change the more they stay the same. And being vigilant to kick ignorance in the ass straight on takes balls.
Superior television dramatic writing and monent. Loved it. Number ONE for a reason in my viewing choices.
s
I don’t know maybe you guys had it easier growing up. I had a step brother who was a big football jerk that came in and treated me like shit called me a fag and everything. That was before I even came out. If my father would have ever once stood up for me half the way that Curt’s father did it would’ve made me be able to have more respect for him then I do today. And no it’s not about him not being able to stand up for himself because he’s gay it’s the point that someone,especially a father, CARED enough to possibly lose his relationship for standing up for a wrong that he see’s. It’s about having a back bone to stand up when you see an injustice in any sense of the word. Maybe ya’ll are just to jaded to see it, or maybe we just need to go back to what my grandfather used to say when I was growing up. If you don’t have anything nice to say maybe you should just shut your fucking mouth.
You have to see the whole episode to really appreciate what a revolutionary cultural moment of television this is. These layers of truth are so complicated and are NEVER addressed in popular culture. Kurt is totally crushed out over Finn, but trying to ‘act normal’ to be non-threatening. He re-decorates his room to help Finn feel like there can be a healthy compromise…Finn is so much more considerate than the average high school straight guy, but still feels objectified and is being called gay all the time for his associating with Kurt. Dad is not defending a weak son…he is acting with all the morality necessary to end discrimination. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, anyone? The show vindicates and spotlights all the suffering of gay teens everywhere…and with a Gaga theme to match!? Perfect! LOL
Your post was off to a great start, Brandon47240. But am I the only one who sees irony in a line like, “If you don’t have anything nice to say maybe you should just shut your fucking mouth”???
My feelings aren’t so clear cut. I am old enough, 49, to know what the 50-ish guys are saying, and I admit to being an on-again off-again viewer, but . . .
as I recall, the gay character was plotting to get the straight character to move in with him. He even got the parents together, right? Now, the straight character faces the prospect of moving in to someoneelse’s house, which he doesn’t want to do, and giving up his own room to share a room that looks like it is out of an old Bette Davis film . . . then the dad piles on him, despite the fact that he is about as open and accepting as mot 17 year old kids can be . . .
I thought the whole thing was unfair to the straight character, who is the only one of all of them (other guy, guy’s dad, straight guy’s mom) who didn’t want his life disrupted this way. . .
That said, i appreciate the spirit of the more favorable comments: a father standing up for his gay son would, otherwise, have been a great scene.
I was equally choked up by this momemnt. It is scenes like this that make Glee the AMAZING show that it is. I was so impressed at the commitment to fairness by the character (and ultimately the writers) that they would show how words to hurt the soul and support discrimination.
Wow, I love it. Here in Australia we only just saw the episode where Rachel loses her voice. Looking forward to this one!
I think he deserves the “father of the year” award…
as for Kurt’s behavior, he is a teenager… teenagers do not have all the considerations in the world… so was he trying to lure Finn into his world? that is out of love…
Finn’s reaction? out of fear and possibly hate…
words are powerful….. one may not mean it, but someone else might feel it anyway…
should we tell Kurt to not be himself? should he go into a closet inside the gay closet?
I totally related to that scene as far as my experiences growing up gay, even though I am not as flamboyant as Kurt…… (36 here, if that matters)…. I have students now that remind me of Kurt, and I try to make them know that it is okay to be whom they are…
we as a community should embrace all our shades of gay =-)
AAA– It was supposed to be ironic. It always made us all laugh when he said it.
Call me crazy but isn’t this entire show one long “faggy moment.”
I was shocked Mike O’Malley (the father) was such a good actor. I still remember him hosting Guts (yes, “Do ya have it? GUTS!” on Nickelodeon) near the start of his career.
As for the other two… well, in context, they are both less than admirable. I get the fear and discomfort with unwanted advances, but Finn could have handled that differently. I also get the longing and unrequited love on Kurt’s end, but that totally doesn’t make it okay. You can’t make anyone love you.
Now, back to Mike O’Malley. Maybe it’s because he is a father, maybe he is just a grossly underrated actor, but he NAILED that scene. It was believable the way the character stood up for his son, and that he had also come to terms with his own angst and fears. It was like a less extreme version of Ed Norton’s epiphany over the course of American History X.
Hate is bad.
Love is good.
People are what matters.
If only more people thought like that. If only… if only…
I love this clip it kinda made me cry as well.. but why do you have it flipped in the video?
I think the dad is a fag too. lol
This has been such an interesting set of comments. Some really great insight here.
I think Kurt has the typical teenage crush that is fueled with raging testosterone. As a very out gay boy (with the raging testosterone) he is not being very sensitive to a guy (Finn) that has always been very tolerant and cool. And perhaps like a lot of teenage boys Finn is confused about his own sexuality. In some ways Kurt stepped over the line. Finn reacted emotionally but inappropriately by using the faggy word. I think they both learned a lesson. That is called growth… leading to maturity.
The scene came out of no-where if you are’nt a regular viewer but for me, as a regular viewer, it was a great moment between father and son. It set a boundary for Finn and validated Kurt for who he is.
Bravo for family values. This is what family values is for me. Valuing, teaching and showing our love for one another. I’ll be watching again next week.
I was also happy how peoples use of the word retard was brought up. People just say, “it doesnt really mean much, its what everyone says” or things of that nature, but its hurtful also because its used in a negative context and its used to be hurtful. I have a brother with down syndrome and there are very few people that will actually stick up for them. Yet if people say the work nigger, they are called racist and looked down upon. We need to put all these words in the same category and do away with them.
I missed the episode entirely, but the clip was powerful indeed. Perhaps people just need to be more open with the truth about the way the feel, and less politically correct, and everyone would be much better off.
he is, a little queer…
Brandon: OK, point taken. Sometimes people say things like that without intending the irony!
Blaine, you would have a point, except you are wrong as far as I am concerned. You don’t know my circumstances. What I still deal with from day to day. So don’t point your finger at me without a clue as to what I’ve put up with. And continue to do so!
I still say the scene was lame. But what would I know? I wasn’t gay back when things were tough…….
having now watched the episode, and seeing it all in it’s context, my view is unchanged. Powerful clip, powerful message. It’s there, it’s right, let’s move forward people.
wow guys; your comments and ideologies afre quite impressive, i did not particularly enjoy the clip i thought it was very heavy how kurt’s dad came down upon finn, it was unrealistic. i thought the scene was blown out of proportion for my liking and it had a strong stigma attached to it. Kurt is one of my liked characters in glee, but his persuing finn in the worst possible ways has gathered me less respect for Kurt’s character – his crush for finn should have been more secretive, and not so destructive. we cannot be much symapathetic towards kurt on this one because he was not listening to Finn, and finn out of confusion and sheer frustration lashed out – i dont balme him!i think kurt needs to back off a little. although i feel for kurt becasue his character has been singled out again, and an image of ‘being victimised’ has been protrayed, but in fact it is finn who is being victimised by kurt! Scenes like this do not bring out the stronger base points of characters such as kurt, but seem to change the character, Kurt to me has become a weakling, and not the strong know it all gay persona he began with!! rather disappointed in this scene.
When that scene first aired it choked me up. It’s a powerful moment. Do I think it was overhanded? No.
Don’t get me wrong. I have been a little disturbed late because of Kurt’s massive, not-so-subtle crush on Finn (which I don’t get, but that’s another discussion entirely). Kurt’s actions at times have pushed the thought that gays convert straights. But haven’t we all had that one crush on a guy who was totally unattainable because he’s straight or attached? Kurt is a 16 year old gay teen in a town that seems ‘SO accepting of gays’ so I can see his confusion and inability to see reason.
But that scene is very powerful. It reminds us that there are so many kids out there that associate gay with bad and if something is wrong, unattractive, or undesirable it is therefore “gay” or “faggy.” Even when those words are not directed at a person it sends the message that something is disliked therefore it is gay.
Burt standing up for his son is not a testament to how weak gay guys are. It is an example of what can happen when people stand up for bigotry and the implication that something is gay and therefore wrong. I wish my dad could do that.
Maybe the scene is a little dramatic and Kurt isn’t exactly squeaky clean in his motives, but some of you seem to take for granted what growing up in a world that shoves fag down your throat really means and how one word can truly be destructive.
*I love this because GLEE is for tweens, but look at us talking about it seriously, even passionately. Sigh. SO many great (albeit sensationalized/exaggerated) messages and themes are being infused into young pop culture; boys singing lady gaga at the piano on national TV, main stream pop stars advocating for tolerance and equality, primetime TV shows(glee) having sympathetic gay characters, with gay issues, brought into millions of American households.
Maybe the perspectives on this issue vary so greatly because it is a teen/kid show? And were a bunch of men(i’m 23) discussing it?
Shame on young, gay people(however) taking for granted the struggles that past generations have gone through, and the fact that although many of us, myself included, NEVER had annnyyyy problems being gay, never hated on in any way, there are still SO many young people who are beaten, harassed, disowned, suicidal because of it.
This show is silly, the gay boy character is cliche, over the top, annoyingly gay, but maybe that’s exactly what he needs to be? To get the point across in obvious, literal ways to the (young) people who watch the show?
The scene made me a little uncomfortable, I gotta say, because I have beautiful straight male friends, who are HARASSED by my gay friends/or just gays in general when we go out together, and they are SO nice, and SO accepting/tolerant, but how much should they/could they be expected to tolerate when they’re NOT interested?
I don’t really think the little melodramas that took place in the scene are important, over all it is the fact that this message is getting OUT there to SO many young people. And like we are here, the topics/arguments are being discussed. It is wonderful, it really is.
What a scene. burt is a stud. In reality it doesn’t happen that way! I was the gay son and my brother was the good football player that got all the respect! Then college happened. I went to Berkley, graduated with honors got a great job.Still have my great job. My brother went to Sac State and majored in partying.Flunked out after 3 semesters football hero and all. I think he is on the streets in LA at this time. We all lost contact with him.I miss my brother even though he was mean to me. My father is leaving his millions to me the fag. Justice in life sometimes takes time but I still miss my brother. It is not all happiness!!
I suprised you guys don’t see the message in all this. for those of us who lived it it is elementary. You others have no clue. It’s not about the faggy interior design. Its about the relationship between a straight father and his gay son. You younger guys are clueless! It was right to the point and extremely well done!
that was an awesome scene, but the episode was overall schmaltzy. and what was with rachael and her mother singing poker face to each other? i’ll get him hard, show him what he’s got? are they from the south?
Ok. You talk about us younger guys not having to put up with the dads not approving. You are so out of touch! It STILL happens today! My father loves me, but will NEVER approve of the gay lifestyle. My “friends” if they knew I were gay would not be my friends! I have lost friends because I came out to them! I live in a community of five thousand with 14 churches! The industry that I’m involved in for work does not approve of homosexuality! I face it every day! So don’t say that I don’t know what they went through! I’m still there!
JIM H…Will you marry me?
i GREW UP WITH FOUR OLDER MACHISMO BROTHERS WHO WERE EITHER IN THE MILITARY, JOCKS, AND/OR PLAYBOYS. tHE RELATIONSHIPS ARE STILL STRAINED. All of them refused to acknowledge me as their sibling in school. I like the espisode I just didn’t care for them using the F word, in any context. If it was a racial word it would have been bleeped.
Finding happiness through the failures of others is not justice. It simply means you haven’t moved on with your life. Think about this, would you still be as equally happy if that college drop-out, homeless, down-and-out-on-his-luck person was your gay counterpart? You should be proud of your achievements by merit alone, and not footnote it with the failures of those who have hurt you.
you need to see the whole show to understand where finn came from. kurt was being a creep that he is. he was calculating and his father had no idea where kurt was up to. it was a faggy lamp and it was a faggy blanket. after this i wish kurt change his way about all this like finn surely does.
When it comes to Kurt’s crush on Finn, I do believe it is a set-up for Kurt’s romance in the second season. Everyone else in the group has found romance in one way or another, but not Kurt. There’s even an episode where Kurt goes into detail on why he likes Finn. And I’m still crushing on straight boys. I can’t help it! They’re the forbidden fruit!
Anyway, I love this show way too much so I could write a novel here.
In regards to this scene, I absolutely loved it. I’ve been called “fag” and stuff, and I was never brave enough to stick up for myself, and had I been out of the closet at the time, I’m sure my dad would have reacted like Burt did, whether it was inside our home, at school, anywhere. This scene made me appreciate just how much my dad has grown in terms of accepting me and loving me for who I am, and for that, I am extremely thankful.
@Jim H
Bite your tongue. I am a “young” guy of 25. You don’t know the age of who agrees or disagrees with you. Yes, the scene reads like the affirmation of a father’s unconditional love for his son to me as well, but you come across as more than a bit narrow minded and as an ageist by saying that “young guys don’t get it”.
The scene does contain more. The pressures Finn is facing from Kurt to be in love with him and the pressures his team mates are putting on him to drop Glee and conform the the hetro-norm. Finn is getting boned, HARD from all sides. How would you feel if everyone kept pushing you to be one thing or another?
Thank you Verdell! I agree!
sabazius: you’re treading on censorship via the PC police…who says that the word “gay” should be exempt from connoting a negative? You used black as an attempt of misuse to get your point across. Would it matter if someone said, that’s so “ghetto”? Same meaning to the same group of people, albeit indirect. If being critical about the semantics of the word “gay” itself displeases you, then we are also at fault for hijacking and redefining that very same word to include it as meaning homosexual. We took the word gay, transformed it into a slang, stamped it onto our foreheads and into the lexicons, and now we are associated with that word stripped of its original meaning. Do we see another term being coined for the next generation…McHomo?
I’m waiting for the episode where Finn comes home drunk and starts making out with Kurt then wakes up hungover and starts the denial act.
That would truly be a “Faggy” moment.
F word aside, I completely side with Finn. Kurt is a major creep towards Finn and reinforces the negative stereotype that a gay guy can’t maintain boundaries with a straight guy. THANKS GLEE
yea the room was crazzzy much!