When I saw this over on our best friend blog Queerty’s page, I cracked up. E! gave the oldest Jonas brother Kevin (“Gramps Jonas”) a reality show. Kevin is married to hairburner Danielle Deleasa. It’s a Ryan Seacrest production!

(Note – they are our best friend blog for obvious reasons. We’ll stop simpering anytime now, I’m just thrilled we’ve got a Facebook page again.)

I’ll say it – I think Kevin Jonas and Joe Jonas are homosexuals. I feel that the only straight Jonas is Nick Jonas (despite this pic). It’s just my opinion. I could be totally wrong. They just read to me like they’re gay. You are welcome to agree or disagree.

Hence, I feel like Kevin Jonas’ marriage to a hairdresser is a John Travolta situation. They reportedly slept (sleep?) in separate rooms and he claims to have been a virgin until he got married. He was sporting one of those ridiculous fucking purity rings. If that’s what makes them ecstatic with joy (“that” being “a sham marriage documented for a reality show”) then fuck me. But I reserve the right to take all sorts of amusement from this.

What can not be denied is that hotness runs in the Jonas family, and they have bubble asses. Without even throwing in that they play their own instruments, they’re still light years more useful than those Kardashian twats.

– J. Harvey

1,672 thoughts on “MARRIED TO LIES!

  1. apart from guliana and bill, the other ryan seacrest-produced reality programmes are really insulting our intelligence. stop watching. 

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