We absolutely love Kelis. We really do. But after the great Steve Holcomb incident of 2010, how is no one suspicious by her four-week winning streak on our Weekly Top Ten charts? While “Scream” is an excellent dance track, some folks might argue that Pink or Robyn deserve a crack at the number one spot. Will they get their chance in this round?
It’s impossible to say. However, we can tell you who won’t have the opportunity to dethrone the self-proclaimed “first girl to scream on a track”. Kylie Minogue, Willow Smith, Taio Cruz and the Scissor Sisters didn’t gain enough votes to stay on the countdown, so we had to send them packing along with Wild Card rejects Pixie Lott and Kaci Battaglia.
So how does this all work? If you’re a Weekly Top Ten virgin, take a moment to fondle Carter while I explain the rules to you. Each week you’ll be presented with ten songs. You get to vote for up to three that you’d like to see move on to the next week. From those results, we’ll take the five tunes with the highest percentages, a song we save and four other contributions. These selections will make up the following week’s charts.
Wishing there was a “none of the above” option? Well, quit your bitching and tell us what you want to see on the charts by leaving a suggestion in the comments. We listen to nearly every song you recommend, and if we think it’ll have a chance… you might see it here next time around!
To check out the charts and cast your vote, follow the JUMP:
- Kelis – Scream (LW – 1, W5): Okay, so we’re really not accusing anyone of rigging the votes, but we will start pointing fingers if she sweeps the countdown for another ten weeks. With a David Guetta beat and some fierce moves, this bitch deserves to be in the top position.
- Pink – Raise Your Glass (LW – 2, W5): We would like to raise our glasses to Pink for tacking a decent and memorable song onto our greatest hits collection. Please take note, nearly every other musical artist in the world. This is how you thank your fans for supporting your career. Lil Wayne cameos and references to threesomes are totally unnecessary.
- Robyn – Indestructible (LW – 5, W3): A couple of days ago, the music video for this track dropped. It’s basically a bunch of people fucking, along with Robyn wearing some weird contraption with tubes. In other words? It’s totally awesome. Team Robyn, all the way!
- Duffy – Well, Well, Well (LW – 9, W2): Wait, how did this happen? Several readers complained that Duffy’s vocals were downright terrible on this song, yet you somehow voted her into fourth place. Sometimes, we don’t really understand your logic, but we’re just going to smile, nod and move on with our lives.
- Rihanna – Only Girl (In The World) (LW – 3, W8): Should we move forward to RiRi’s next single “What’s My Name”? Or would you prefer we wait until the music video drops? We’re more “Torn” than Natalie Imbruglia. While this song still gets our adrenaline pumping, it’s certainly been on the countdown for a long time…
- Ke$ha – We R Who We R (LW – 8, W2): At this moment, we imagine the Sassy Gay Friend coming out of nowhere and asking us, “What are you doing? What, what, WHAT are you doing?” It may be entirely out of character for us to save Ke$ha, but we’re going to do it whether you (or we) like it or not. Deal with it.
- Katy Perry – Firework (DEBUT): Pyrotechnic boobs! That’s really all you need to know about this song. With this one track, Katy Perry may have single-handedly made up for the atrocities known as “I Kissed A Girl” and “Ur So Gay”. MAYBE. This goes out to anyone who’s ever felt like a plastic bag. Keep your heads up, and maybe one day you’ll shoot fire out of your nipples.
- Nelly Furtado – Night Is Young (DEBUT): While this isn’t Nelly Furtado’s best piece of work, it’s still enough to get the dance floor bumping. It’s almost enought to convince me to pick up her greatest hits collection, except for the fact that I already own every single one of her albums…
- Nicki Minaj f/ will.i.am – Check It Out (WILD CARD): After delivering scene-stealing verses on tracks like “Monster” and “Bedrock”, it’s a shame Nicki Minaj’s yet to create a solo track that lives up to her full potential. With that said, we’re willing to settle for this, even if the line about haters killing themselves makes us sort of uncomfortable. Um, it gets better?
- The Band Perry – If I Die Young (WILD CARD): One will.i.am track is enough on these charts. Just kidding! The Black Eyed Peas will perform much better after the release of their super-futuristic music video for “The Time (The Dirty Bit)”, so we thought we’d give this Wild Card runner-up a second chance.