There’s so much more to you than meets the eye. These inspirational words first came to us in the form of Jane Fonda‘s famous workout tapes, and they ring true for a handful of contestants on last night’s “Totally Leotarded” episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race.
We were pleasantly surprised by a few of the queen’s performances, throwing some unlikely candidates toward the top of our list. They even managed to impress this week’s guest judges, La Toya Jackson (WTF) and fitness guru Susan Powter.
And while this is all fine and dandy, let’s move on to more important questions… Like, who was our favorite queen? Why are Raja’s facial expressions (see picture above) so fucking incredible? And did you agree with last night’s elimination?
– Dewitt
To watch this episode and check out the rankings, follow the JUMP:
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Catch Up: Episode 1 – The Queen Who Mopped XMas, Episode 2 – Queens In Space
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1. YARA SOFIA (LW – 10): We know we’re not supposed to laugh when people reinforce stereotypes, but Yara Sofia’s workout tape character was so over-the-top that you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing. Delta Work accurately deemed her as “Uber-Charo”. Though we’re still quite frightened by Yara’s ice blue contact lenses, this was a performance worthy of America’s next drag superstar.
2. SHANGELA (LW – 2): Opinions are divided on Shangela. Can you guess which side of the fence we fall on? One minute she’ll be delivering snappy one-liners, the next she’ll be spilling her heart out backstage. There’s something very human, spontaneous and uncalculated about her presence. And can you really deny the awesomeness of the Halleloo-lah-hoop?
3. ALEXIS MATEO (LW – 8, Winner): Don’t get us wrong. We really liked Alexis Mateo’s “Chrissy Snow” lip gloss routine, yet it appeared to be more of a happy accident than anything else. With that said, we get why she won over Yara in the end. Her final runway look was much more polished, and those curves were absolutely kickin’.
4. RAJA (LW – 4): Initially, we had Raja ranked much lower on today’s list. However, once we began assembling screen-caps for this episode, we noticed all the comical facial expressions she kept making in the background of other contestants’ workout segments. It was very subtle, unlike her crude ball-crushing routine. Insert random segue! Whether you like Raja or not, you’ve got to admit it–this bitch has style. That “slutty house wife waiting for the pool boy” look was truly inspired.
5. MANILA LUZON (LW – 1): Fuck me with a giant stick of lipstick! How are you so consistently flawless, Manila Luzon? Your exercise schtick wasn’t anything to write home about, but you were seriously working some Cruella de Vil inspired fierceness on the runway. That wig! That dress! Those lips! If you weren’t a man in a dress, we’d go straight and propose to you.
6. STACY LAYNE MATTHEWS (LW – 3): It’s yet to be determined whether Stacy’s criticism will result in her empowerment or her fizzling out of the competition. Yes, she’s turned out two back-to-back hilarious acts (see last week‘s space alien), but they’ve both required a great amount of direction and micro-managing. We won’t be convinced until we see this sister doin’ it for herself.
7. DELTA WORK (LW – 6): After watching both this episode and the subsequent installment of Untucked, we made a list of the four queens who have the sharpest wit and ability to think on their feet. You can probably guess that Delta was among the group, along with Raja, Manila and Shangela. This isn’t a quality we’ve seen in the show’s previous big girls (maybe Mystique), and we’re keeping our fingers crossed that she’ll make it to the top three. At least.
8. MARIAH (LW – 7): Much like Raja, we had Mariah marked lower on our original list. Then we remembered this amazing brown-on-brown ensemble, equipped with a crazy-ass wig that could elicit a jealous response from the likes of Diana Ross or Chaka Khan. We’ll ignore your “gay cruise ship” antics, as long as you keep delivering looks like this.
9. CARMEN CARRERA (LW – 9): So pretty, yet so naive! We know attractive people aren’t always huge cunt-bags, but we’re continually surprised by how nice Carmen is to her competitors. There’s a refreshing innocence here, and we hope it sticks around until she’s eliminated. Because let’s be honest–she will be eliminated.
10. INDIA FERRAH (LW – 5, Chante, You Stay): Can you put away those damn, six-hundred dollar titties? Yes, they’re really eye-catching and deliciously tacky, but there’s so much more to India Ferrah than fake boobs. The judges need to see this. Otherwise, she’ll be kicked to the curb faster than you can say “tarantula coochie”.
11. MIMI IMFURST (LW – 11, Sashay Away): In which we let out an audible sigh! We had high hopes for New York’s own Mimi Imfurst. Honestly, we can’t even call her a disappointment, because she was so much more than that. From the crying games to the misguided acting, it was fantastically painful to watch her week-to-week. We wish her luck! Let’s just hope her appearance on this show didn’t lower her booking fee…
Great rundown! Yara really caught our eye this week! Finally we got to see some of what the judges see in her. Same goes for Alexis. She deserved to win, the lip gloss was poppin’! Borriqua!!
Drag queens kinda freak me out.
I totally hate this shit. For me, being gay means being attracted to MEN, not males playing dress-up.
As a great person once said “If god had intended for us to wear leotards, he would have painted us purple”.
Well, Jimmy T, I think the clear message here then is that being gay means different things to different people. Hopefully, gayness as an identity is not so rigid that it can’t accommodate difference. I’m generally attracted to biological males, yes, but so, I would suspect, are most drag queens. Is one of us somehow more or less gay than the other? Not in my book.
Anyway, love the Drag Race. Count me in for team Raja, at least for the moment (though the attitude can be a bit much).
I’m not all for the fake boobs…I think it’s more convincing when a drag queen can create the illusion of boobs with what they have.
Celephais, I agree. As a drag queen I hear alot ” I am attracted to men not women.” I am farrrrr from a woman, and I find it sad that some people can’t get past an act and see the real person.
Didn’t mean to offend anyone. I said, “For me, being gay means…” To each his own.
I feel like I’m the only one who realized that India Ferrah’s look on the runway was pretty much a look-a-like of Pink’s costume in the Lady Marmalade music video??????
“A bit much” is an understatement. Raja’s obnoxiously condescending, especially to Stacy, and her whole “Stacy’s such a sweet person, but…” thing makes her even more unlikeable.
Ru loves his Asian drag queens (Ongina and Jujubee, anyone?), so I will expect Manila Luzon to go all the way
so glad mimi’s gone. what the fuck is her deal? she’s really not that good of a performer, and relies on her screeching and overacting as her schtick.
i wanna marry carmen carrrera as a boy! he’s a real cutie pie. but thinking this competition is going to be Raja, Delta, and Manila in the end.
TEAM SHANGELA!!!!!!
How PC of you!! I am willing to bet Jimmy T is very young. He will grow someday.
As for the race, Raja gets on my nerves. The guy is talented but the race is for the next drag superstar. Drag seems more like a hobby for Raja.
I must say if the competition is all about seeing how far you have come from strat to finish Shangela is working it fierce girl. The first challenge I kept asking myself, “Ru what are you doing? ” But then consistantly after that she has wowed us time and time again. So for moost improved and nice to the other contestants- go team Shangela. However word to the wise as the competition gets more intense, you have to remain consistant in your routine. In the words of RuPaul “Don’t f*ck it up!”