Quite frankly, I don’t give a damn if you’re not into “fatties, fems or old dudes”. Indicating such restrictions in your Manhunt profile may seem like a good idea to you. It saves you the inconvenience of turning down guys you’re not into, right? Unfortunately, it has the consequence of making you sound like a total asswipe.
I hate to rehash the advice of Varla Jean Merman, but you should tell us what you are into rather than what you’re not into. Saying that you’re into “non-smokers” comes off as a little less combative than “PLEASE DON’T CONTACT ME IF UR A SMOKER”.
When you focus on the positive, it’s a polite way of saying what you’re looking for without isolating an entire community of individuals. Of course, am I the only one who thinks “into white guys only” sounds just as douche-tastic as “not into (insert race here)”? Just wondering.
– Dewitt
To see the full picture, follow the JUMP:
Yeah, racial preferences are just another manifestation of racism. I won’t contact any guy who has “not into Asians” or “pref Euro only”.
Though I guess not being into racists makes me guilty of racistism 😛
wow.. now this is an awesome posting. and very true. i hope plenty read and get a clue.
I was telling my friend how I thought it was surprising that people put “whites only” in their profiles. Though I probably see as many black guys who say that as white guys, it still just seems crazy to me. I don’t think having a racial preference is racist, at person can’t force their self to be attracted to a certain race just as one can’t for their self to be attracted to fat people or skinny people or anything they aren’t attracted to. But you don’t need to put it out there for everyone to read. Though I think saying “I prefer thin guys” sounds just as douchey as saying “no fatties.” Maybe some people are dense enough to not see past the fake niceness, but I’m not.
there is nothing wrong with saying WHITES ONLY. it cuts down on unwanted messages. and when you’re a free member (because why pay for MH??), you need to cut to the chase.
i’m not racist — just have a preference for fellow white guys. there is a huge difference.
if women were on this site looking to hook up with us, you sure as hell would see a lot of MEN ONLY listings.
i.e., we have a preference for men.
i do have on my profile what i am into, certain races, age group etc, but i still get alot of people outside that criteria asking me to make an exception. i am willing to make exceptions sometimes, but be realistic
I think it’s perfectly normal to not be atracted by a certain race/age/body type in general, but personally, even tough I like my men big and furry, there’s occasionally a “pretty” guy who I can be into. So I think it’s best not to automatically reject anybody who has some particular trait because he may have a whole bunch of other traits that can make you like him
everyone hs his own taste in guys.. i personaly don’t like guys who smoke.. i just don’t think theyt relize that smell that gets on thier hands also goes to other places. i was with a guy that smoked and when i went down on him all i could smeel was that nasty smel lover his cock and balls.. so i made him the last smoker i played with.
I used to say, “No one bald” until I lost my hair…
“No one over 30” until I passed 30…
Now that I’ve grown up I find that a simple “I really appreciate your interest, but its not a match for me. Best of luck!” works well.
I just block the people who I want no contact with. easier that way.
Great post, and thanks for putting it in a POSITIVE manner.
There is nothing wrong with being “only” into a particular quality in men, but rather than throwing your venom all over everyone else’s MH experience (and every other place where you can internetically solicit for sex, romance and other unrealistic fantasies) you can be SPECIFIC about what you DO want.
Well said, but I fear that this will sail over the heads of the self-righteous.
When are you going to do a post about the vast number of men in their 40s and 50s and 60s who are a.) lying about their ages to appear younger and b.) advertising that they’re only interested in much younger males?
I await.
I have to say, until now I’ve only really been attracted to white guys (or mixed where european genes represent half or more) with the odd asian. However, I doubt I’d put a specific racial preference on my profile. I mean, you never know!
That being said, I don’t usually like black guys, but Taye Diggs… mmmmmhhhmmmmmm
I notice even when you write what you want, people ignore it. No one reads the text..they just look at the pics.
I’m just sayin’…
Yes, unfortunately some people just don’t understand why stating a racial preference is racist. But the fact is if you have racial preference in your profile YOU ARE A RACIST.
Stick to stating what you do like as far as qualities in men.
i don’t get why you would think this makes a you an a-hole.
prime example for me is NOT INTO ASIANS because, i infact, have no SEXUAL desire for Asians.
Have I met many and have friends who are? Yes. Do I try to avoid any? No.
But have I ever been sexually attracted to any… NO.
Manhunt is a site for sex. If a guy has a preference for muscular masculine bear types, it because that type does it for him.
I have in fact, met MANY hot gay Asians at Gay Days and other events [guys I would qualify as HOTTER then me] but I just didn’t have that spark, desire, or click.
So when I’m on a site to meet and screw guys, I want JUST GUYS THAT TURN ME ON.
If I want to meet/chat/get to know men, I go to bars.
Lets all be real please
@AmericanSoldier
That’s actually an extremely childish way of dealing with it, hope this helps.
Bravo! It is easy to get frustrated because “the wrong guys” keep contacting you and so venom ends up in your profile and then guess what…you’re turning off everyone with your negative attitude. Just say who you are and what you are seeking and let everyone self select. If you get an email from someone you aren’t into, just be a man and say “thanks, but no thanks”. Blocking guys is really just passive aggressive behavior. Perhaps we should just be flattered that someone (no matter what they look like) was interested enough to inquire (or wink or unlock). Think how you’ll feel when it all stops. Good manners go a long way even in cyber-world.
I didn’t put a racial preference in my MH profile because I realized that ethnicity doesn’t matter to me, especially since I’m African American, Native American with a little bit of Caucasian mixed in. I’ve even been mistaken for being latin.
For me it was all about the pictures you posted. If I liked your look I’d tell you but it didn’t automatically mean I wanted to have sex with you. If we started talking and it went it that direction then we’d set up a time or place. I agree that you should focus more on what you like to do and other interests instead of skin color.
I guess my biggest thing is that I am into intelligent men only. Guess this leaves Dewitt out. So what does that make me? Anti-dumb? How horrible!
I would rather know from a profile if I a guy is into twinks. Saves me time so I don’t bother him. That doesn’t necessarily make the other guy ageist. Geez people, grow up!
Finding some races more attractive than others is not racist in any shape or form. Racial features are very distinctive, obviously, and people have different tastes. I, for example, do not find most black people sexually attractive – not because I consider them inferior than me, but because thick lips and wide noses do not turn me on regardless of whether they’re on a white dude or a black dude. Black dudes just happen to have them more often than white dudes.
what a bunch of assholes you guys are…..
no blacks, no whites, no one over 30…
no wonder people think we are immoral…..
What I find amazing are the people that email me and I am not their type, too old too beefy according to their profile. And they get offended when I tell them I’m not interested
Why should someone’s immutable traits, like skin colour, or wide noses, be thought of as something reasonable to discriminate upon?
Smoking is a choice, and weight, to a degree, is too. So these are somewhat different.
“I’m not into older guys” is just a foolish statement. Rather, “I’m looking for someone with similar experiences and goals to my own, who is into similar things,” is a fair way of saying, “it’s not *because* you are some arbitrary age, it’s because where you are at with your life is probably different to where I am with mine, and where I want mine to go”.
I think we need to ask the question, “why don’t I find black/asian/white/whatever guys attractive”. If the answer is something like “they have wide noses” then really, what about having a wide nose makes someone unworthy of the chance to get to know you, and you them? I would hope it wasn’t predicated on some explicit or implicit attribution of biological inferiority (like those who genuinely think, rather idiotically, that caucasians are actually more evolved forms of the species). Other than that, I can’t see what it is about racial markers that are so undesirable that you would rule out a whole group of potential lovers, husbands, wives, or friends.
(By the way, I am 19, white, and a borderline “twink” from New Zealand, if any of you care to know where I am coming from).
I’m an ethnic guy and SO over the whole race thing, I just don’t approach anyone at all on Manhunt. If I see a profile I like, I wonder if he won’t be into non-white guys (just because every second profile here in Australia seems to have a racial preference). So I never wink/IM/send a message. The odd hookup that I do do results from the other guy making the first move.
Just the other side of the coin.
This is a very heavy subject i think its a matter of what u think and if its socially accepted to say it or not… in one hand u have the rigth to be atraccted to some particular type of men and u should be able to speak it out loud (we always ask for the rigth to be what we want to be and to do what we want to do), in other hand ive always thought its simply not rigth to discriminate someone not even from your life just because of some particular feature… So in conclusion i think the policy of “thanks but no thanks” its the one who works for the best.
why does anyone care? its manhunt. where we troll the internet for sex. why worry about being pc? they dont wanna fuck you so they say so in their profile. simple. no ones talking about segregating schools and churches. chill out…
I was reading through the responses, and right off the bat, somebody had to bring up racism when the talk is really about fetishism. Just as a reminder, fetishism is about those things that turn a person on sexually. Racism is about disliking someone of another race. RACE and ETHNICITY fit into fetishism perfectly, because there are men who are only turned on by members outside of their own race and ethnicity. Likewise, there are men turned off by men outside of their own race and ethnicity. It doesn’t make them racists. Everybody has those things that they look for in their sexual partners, and for some men, it isn’t someone who is from another ethnic or racial group.
I learned a long time ago to not put preferences into the profile. As a general rule, I am not turned on by the average black or Asian guy. Sorry, I am not, but I have met some really hot guys of other racial and ethnic groups that I have had encounters with. I am human, I have that prerogative to change my mind. Likewise, I am Bear, and I prefer Bears and cubs, but if a chaser or a twink want to meet up, I have been known to sway. The fact that my primary interest are sometime selective does not make me elitist or a racist. The people I associate on a regular basis, my friend, who do not share my bed, come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. I don’t know, maybe some guys only have friends they fuck? In that case, maybe they are a bit racist, but I think the majority of guys out there have a whole life of different people they associate with,and in this day and age, a lot of us have friends outside of our immediate racial group.
Dewitt was talking about how to communicate politely ones taste and preferences, and I think sometimes guys do go overboard. I just go on, when I see where a guy is looking for a specific age, body type or racial group that doesn’t fit who I am. I don’t take offense usually. I also know sometimes it means nothing. If I am into a guy, I just contact him. If he isn’t into me, he can just ignore me. I wish I had a dime for the guys I have had encounters with who said only under 30. I would be rich. If I am not interested in someone, then I say “Thank you” and not lead them on. If they are persistent, I will then say something like I don’t we are a match. For me, it is a lot easier to communicate one-on-one when I am contacted, and it definitely opens up the possibilities to meet someone new. I guess for some guys, that would be a challenge, and I guess putting up perimeters up front would be better for them.
I sometimes believe that guys think with the wrong head. Putting preferences up front, is like being very superficial. That is okay, if you are looking for just sex, and you don’t need him to talk besides pleasantries. Be as selective as you want. I am looking for a relationship, so I look for more than that exterior.
I was a bartender and bar manager at a leather bar way back when, and I had a motto, that I think applies here. Pretty only gets you one drink, you need a personality to keep them at the bar. Same thing with any relationship, whether a one-time situation or a LTR. If you are only looking for a one time sexual thing, then look on the outside. If you are looking for something more, then look past what is on the outside, or you missing the rest of the enchilada.
I do have my preferences, but a great, amenable personality can make me change my mind, every time.
The whole “not into” thing sounds pretty tacky/classless to me. Even if a guy doesn’t say something against me, i’m not going to date or associate with someone who is a bigot or some type of gay-elitist.
and what gives a person the right to make demands and discriminate against others? who are you?! a bama-bumpkin from mississippi who moved to west hollywood and now you think you’re something?!
Personally i’ve talked with guys who I wasn’t into and some of them have turned out to be really good guys/friends.
I think as gay men it’s important to have platonic male friends. Not all relationships with men have to be based on sex…..
We certainly have female friends who aren’t attractive, but we don’t cast them off like yesterday’s rubbish.
What defines a racist is ignorance ( not stating a preference on M/H ) How come if a straight guy said he only dates blonds with big tits nobody screams racist ! People have a right 2 there likes & dislikes . Preference is one thing IGNORANCE is another !!!
Rad, you are so stupid.
i hope i’m not alone in thinking there’s NO limit on what makes a guy hot…”white guys only”? good lord, have you SEEN some of the hot black guys, filipino guys, latino guys on this site…or in the world?
and 30 is definitely not the cut off point for being hot. bradley cooper anyone? for that matter…anderson cooper?
keep those restrictions in your profiles, though. more hot guys for me. 🙂
…mmm…branderson cooper.
I definitely tend to find myself physically attracted to guys from some ethnic/racial backgrounds more than others, but this has nothing to do with “racism.” All the -isms (racism, sexism, ageism) are fundamentally matters of denying certain classes of individuals their RIGHTS for no just cause. However, no one has a RIGHT to have sex with me or anyone else. All of us “discriminate” based (in part) on the physical appearance of our potential sexual partners.
Aww, afersakajamie tried so hard to act like he’s a good person and non-elitist, and ended up sound more elitist than anyone else.
So you think people from Mississippi are elitist but West Hollywood is all inclusive? Lol you are a silly confused homo.
I glad the picture picks a hot guy smoking. See what anti smokers are missing.
Hello! Am I the only one who actually read this blog?
It’s not about racist this and racist that!
It’s about focusing on and communicating your likes and not your dislikes!!!
Be positve and you will attract positive guys that you like!!!
And what about the other races who include “no whites?” I have seen even more verbose comments pertaining to how they felt about whites or contacting them. Actually why doesn’t Manhunt just filter this as they do approve everyones profile.
BlackJackHammer
JUNE 13, 2010 AT 10:54 PM
What defines a racist is ignorance ( not stating a preference on M/H ) How come if a straight guy said he only dates blonds with big tits nobody screams racist ! People have a right 2 there likes & dislikes . Preference is one thing IGNORANCE is another !!!
….The answer to your question ‘BlackJackHammer’ is because unlike straight people and judging by these comments, us gays have to much time and drama on our hands
:p 21,got to love, Canada !!!
Very interesting comments; I agree the point is not racism. The point is stupidity! My favorite is “Masculine Only”, “No Femmes”, etc. Look in the mirror next time you are getting your ass plowed. I guarantee you don’t look real masculine.
Walter brings up a good point… the last paragraph of this really seems to be like 99% of this thread. lol!
I actually like this posting a lot and really agree with what most was said. FUnny enough I came across a profile that said “I cannot ****ing put up with intolerant people” and nearly pissed myself 😛
There’s nothing wrong with having preferences, but there are methods around it that don’t isolate and put down others. Which I would think a lot of people would try to accomplish, seeing as many claim to want “friendship” and so many of you on here (who defended listing racial preference) being accepting of all people. I definitely have my dislikes and types of men I don’t care to reincounter. But instead of blatantly saying “stay away” on my profile I just make the habit of keeping an eye out for the men that do catch my eye and when I see that they have messaged me I reply to that. (It means a lot of ignored messages, a few blocks, and a few standard regret messages… but I usually find its easier to explain that than try to explain why they automatically do not appeal to you.)
Also, it soudns liek a few of you really take the whole sexual racism thing to heart. Get over it!!! If you even have the slightest preference or comfortability towards one race than another your kinda guilty of it yourself (thoug hkudos for not excluding). To each his own. There are other guys! And for **** sake, its Manhunt. Let’s not take everythign so perosnally. lol! 😛
@Randall interesting take… my sentiment was basically that gays move from small towns where they are disciminated against to gay meccas and some how think they can look down their noses at others. (the abused becomes the abuser)
and people make it seem like they are getting millions of messages online from these men who are almost stalking them… probably more like a handful of messages with one guy mixed in that you don’t fancy.
shouldn’t you just appreciate the fact that someone likes your profile enough to message you? there are billions of people in this world and of all those people you find just a few groups attractive? you might wanna travel and meet more of the world and her people….
look we all find certain things attractive in our potential partners, but that’s no reason to snap at someone who doesn’t fit that mold perfectly.
My only question is this: Why are the options even given? If it’s offensive, shouldn’t they be removed? Just sayin’.
really? manhunt is a website for trolling the internet for sex and i should worry about someone’s feelings? in sex there is acceptance and rejection – deal with it. if people are assholes about it and you don’t like it then don’t hang out with them. i don’t understand why (at least in america) it seems everyone caters to the vocal minority that is always pissed off at something. whatever happened to “get over it?” i have been rejected for being too thin, too fat, too white, too young, too old, too short, too tall, too big of a dick, too small of a dick. you know what i did? i got over it.
racism? please. it is preference. all races may have a right to public facilities but they do not have a right to anyone’s asshole (even as public as some of the asshole’s probably are on here with how much they are used).
and no – i don’t think the options should be removed tam. i think you should get over it.
Ok guys, this is what the truth is. I understand not everybody is in to the same thing, but we do have to be respectful of others. I
I am not sexually attracted to most Asians, not because of any stereotypes but b/c I have certain things i look for in a ma8. I do see some that are just amazing looking, and some not so amazing looking. I actually live with a Korean right now. He is my lifeline being here in Korea.
I am a black guy, but most black guys do not attract me especially darker black guys.
The things i look for is you need to be at least my hieight, at most my skin color and at most my body weight. I am the color of Hershey’s chocolate, i am 5’7″ and weigh a whopping 180 pounds. I don’t have the biggest co*K in the world but it isn’t the smallest. And I don’t care how big your stuff is but This is what i prefer.
okay…well food for thought:
here’s a situation. you’re a 22 year old white guy and you’ve decided to go out to the bars. you see an attractive black guy sitting a few seats down. you don’t go up to him. is that racism? because you actively CHOSE to not talk to him?
you guys are blowing a simple thing WAY out of proportion. a bunch of people here have already said that guys are online for a bunch of different reasons: friends, hook ups, relationships, etc. you have a right to who you’re attracted to, and if you choose to state that in your profile, then that’s just swell. if not, good for you too. there is no right or wrong here.
plus if it WAS deemed racist, don’t you think that manhunt, the government, and other online meeting site would not allow you to search for only specific races or include certain preferences in your profile?
putting it out there.
ps i’m a 23 year old half asian half white guy that’s not at all attracted to other asian guys. does that make me racist and self loathing?
grow up people.
i belong to a group of very intelligent and articulate asians and this matter had been brought up in one of our casual group chats. frankly, none of us are offended when a white guy posts “no to asians” in his profile. most guys in the group are actually not attracted to fellow asians (i’m one of the few exceptions). we look at it as a matter of personal sexual preference, not racism.
I find profiles that are full of “not into” a turn-off in general. Some are such cesspools of negativity that I just block them, ’cause seeing those while hunting for hot guys is a real downer.
I’m 45 and just not that fussy any more
(as long as he has a BIG COCK)
I agree with the spirit and intent of this post, but Manhunt in effect encourages this and other forms of discourtesy on the site by limiting the number of messages its non-paying members may read and send per day. Were there no such limitation (as is the case with other such sites), it would be easy enough to express only one’s preferences, omit one’s dislikes, and then send a simple reply each and every time one receives a message from someone who, for any reason, isn’t of interest. As it is, some guys express themselves in an unduly negative manner to fend off–and avoid wasting messages on–those who don’t match their tastes in the first place. Even more often, many guys skip the courtesy of sending a simple decline (“Thanks, but I go for a different type”) because doing so uses up their daily message allowance.
Isn’t it enough that non-paying members can’t view pics, can’t buddy list more than a handful of guys, can’t save incoming messages, can’t block profiles, can’t save search parameters, can’t view sent mesages, etc.? Must Manhunt also encourage basic rudeness?
Oh, come on, it’s only ten bucks a month, and sometimes less! Man up and lay off the freeloading; if you don’t want to spend anything (and get less in the process). Compared with other outrageous fees, Manhunt has a good balance of price, features, ease-of-use, and traffic.
@Nick
Manliness has nothing to do with it.
Although my reason for not paying for Manhunt isn’t a financial one, the monthly fee may amount to more for some other people than it apparently does to you. Consider yourself lucky.
I say let them be that way, they don’t know any better, or they are too proud to admit that they are putting alot of guys off. I also avoid guys that have racial preferences or just come across in general as douchebags. There are enough good, considerate and forth-coming people that we can just disregard them. 🙂
^what he said^
its so funny, i say the came thing some ppl really don’t know any better and they are the ones that Life just pass right by, with such restrictions you really do miss out on all the good things in life.
And here is another thing that i have some to realize on these sites, when guys say (step to the front of the line) don’t bother. if you have to step to the front of a line then the guy really isn’t worth waiting for.
and that’s the truth
@ItIs: i agree!
“step to the front of the line” has to be the most passive-aggresively arrogant thing on anyone’s profile…it’s like, ew…you’re gonna nail a line of guys? do you need a ride to the clinic?
(at the moment, i’m not really seeing any reason to disagree with the assessment that all the limitations Manhunt places on the non-paying causes at least some of the “curt wordings” one can come across in profiles.
that doesn’t excuse them if they’re Rude, of course.)
i feel that there is nothing wrong with a respectful advisory to certain individuals that their time, likely, would be wasted in pursuit … we are talking about Sexual Couplings, here — not friendships.
when it comes to matters of “Preferences´´ of Ethnicity, then i might conjecture that one should tread more lightly than normal: automatic, global preclusion based on solely on skin colour (without even making an attempt to consider to the merits of the individual in question) is so very wrong, obviously. but, if that is how you truly feel, then say so, and own up to the specific reason why.
and make “exceptions” for no one, either: for i refuse to believe that there could never, at least, be that one Indian, Latino, or Black, who’d cause a major, albeït unexpected, stirring in your pants, that you would very much want to resolve.
but since you’d been so adamant about not mingling with that particular ethnicity, then you will need to stick to your guns, and deny yourself that potential pleasure…
…or, you will need to do some self-reëvaluating, to determine if your bias is worth maintaining.
(obviously, there are some nationalities which appeal to my eyes more than others; but i’d rather “waste time” giving individual rejections, than making an entire type of people feel rejected.
which is why, for myself, i make no mention of what i like — i simply say, “All Ethnicities Welcomed, But You Need A Face Pic Available So I Can See If The Attraction Is Mutual.”)
Dewitt, you have really touched a nerve with this one. I never ceases to amaze me how “off” putting and downright insulting so many of these ads are. The absolute all time worst for me what a ad that went like this at the end of his ad..”NO BLACK GUYS” and I don’t care how hot you think you are! (I kid you not). I sent him a scathing response, called him every name in the book. Since then he has removed the offending parts of his ad because I know damn well I wasn’t the only one who pissed. God,what are some of these guys thinking when they right this stuff. (Be white, be hot, be fit, be young, be PERFECT)..makes me want to fucking scream!
I see nothing wrong saying that you prefer white guys. Nothing is ever said if guy posts he’s looking for other races. I’ve read profiles with lines like; I’m looking for… a black stud, hot latino, or smooth Asain. However, their pragmatics are nicer than saying this race only. You should be open, and be aware of someone comming across so hateful in their profile. And, if you’re white and prefer other wihe guys, doesn’t mean you’re a racist neo-nazi. Just focus on how you get the point across.
I agree that having a long list of qualities you don’t like (no fems, fats, oldies, twinks, blacks, latinos, CDs, baldies, smokers, tattoos, piercings, small dicks, Republicans, left-handers, or guys who like cheese…) just makes you look so full of yourself that I wouldn’t want to play with you anyway. And most of the guys with these lists are young guys who think they’re God’s gift to queerkind. Give them a few years and that list will start getting shorter.
But I think having one or two items like that is not unreasonable. I find CDs a huge turn off and would never play with one, so I don’t think it would be unreasonable to politely indicate that I don’t like them (although I don’t have that in my profile).
Indicating what kind of guys you do like and how you like to play is way classier, and, honestly, way more effective at attracting the guys you want.
I agree it is better to say what you are into instead of saying what you are not but you must realize that people on this sight don’t exactly take a hint. At one point i had an age range of 18-28 on my profile because I am 21, and still I got people 30, 35,45, and way older. It becomes really bothersome I just don’t know why people can’t take a hint
The biggest douchebaggery and combative one-liner I’ve seen somewhere was:
“Why would 40+ guys think I’d be attracted to them when they don’t find their own age group attractive?”
I don’t know, why sugarcoat it. You don’t like blacks, asians,smokers, anybody different than you, poor, etc. Put in your profile. Just lets me know not to waste my time responding. If you gotta figure out how NOT to possibly offend someone in your MANHUNT profile, lol. Your probably a piece of shit in reality anyway.
The age of being politically correct and the over stressing of other people’s feelings has turned people into pussies. The fact is that no matter how nicely you put something, or how you try and sugarcoat lots of guys don’t get the hint unless you put it clearly. Even after that you get people you’re not into because people don’t even read your profile anyway. So what if someone says “No latino guys” or “no black guys”? People are attracted to some types and not others. It’d be the same as me calling you a sexist douche because you’re not into women. You don’t prefer women, some guys don’t feel attracted to white guys, asian guys, latino guys and/or black guys. That’s just how it is, it’s ridiculous to chastise guys and call them racist or stupid or ignorant for not liking some types. They’re not saying “I hate [insert minority/type] guys” they just aren’t interested in sex with them. Deal with it.
Yeah, no one should feel bad about clearly stating what they are into and what they are not. There are good and bad ways to do it…and the douchebags will usually find the crudest and most inflammatory way of saying it. But the above posters are right when they say some guys just don’t take a hint. When I say something nice and innocuous like “I am into younger in shape guys, and hairy is a plus”, I still get 45 year old obese guys messaging me. Anyhow..yeah…we are way too PC these days. People just need to say what they mean and not be rude about it.
In their profile they write “no one over 35” and then THEY contact me. I make them stick to their word.
If you say you won’t get together with guys because of what they are (blacks, whites, fats, fems, old, etc.), you’re a bigot. Face it and stop trying to pretend you’re some liberal gay who believes in equality. It’s because of people like you that we haven’t achieved equality. Go back in the closet and slam the door shut.
Jerry, you’re what twats are made of. Are you willing to say that you’re attracted to ALL types of men? That nothing about a guy turns you off, or no quality or feature is a turn-off? I’m latino, but I am very very attracted to white guys the most, I have not found too many black guys I was attracted to. I am not apologizing for how I feel or what I’m attracted to. Just cause I don’t find very many black guys attractive sexually doesn’t mean I’m a bigot because not pursuing them for sex does not equate to hating them. What a stupid and completely idiotic thing to think. Not having sex with black guys doesn’t preclude me from being their friends or interacting with them in non-sexual ways. You think this is why we haven’t achieved equality? Because all gay guys aren’t having sex with all other gay guys regardless of differences? See how stupid that sounds? No my confused buffoon, equality is not reached because people choose, based on those differences that there are things inferior about those people or that there are substantial differences between peoples that would give one group permission to undermine another group, not cause we’re not all banging, you ridiculous dolt.
The ones that “really” piss me off are the ones that say, and if you’re old or fat don’t even bother…!
Maybe its because I’m old and fat…at least in some guys eyes…and it makes them sound really narrow minded and shallow.
Besides, it also depends on that person’s definition of both of those limits. Hearing some of the comments I hear on this site about the men pictured on here, I’m ancient and obese, and I’m not either of those.
I get plenty of men, so I don’t have any need for the ones who make those statements, hell some of the ones I meet without blantant bias’s like that are weird enough.
Oh, don’t touch my balls, I’ll only fuck a guy if his ass is totally shaved, my nipples are off limits…or the best one of them all is to try and kiss a guy who has just sucked your cock and licked your butthole and he says, “Oh I don’t kiss that’s way too personal!” LOL!!!
Now that’s an effen scream!
To me it’s all about having a little understanding of the other side of things. The person who posts such things like “no fats, fems, or asians” seems to not see that for us fats, fems, or asians out there we don’t just hear it from you. We hear it over and over again (and over some more).
On a side note, I see some people’s comments include whites in the “no” category. Really?! I’ve been on here and stuff like craigslist and though I’ve seen postings/profiles of people that prefer a specific ethnic background, I’ve maybe only seen one that blatantly said “no whites” (even then I’m not sure if that’s a true memory). To be direct, we live in the US where media portrays white masculinity as the ideal sexual image. It just hard growing up in that if you’re not it.
It not about equality or being PC, it’s about understanding another perspective.
Whatevz, you are a bigot. Face it. You use the old, tired, prejudiced thing of saying: some of my best friend are… What’s wrong with black men in your eyes that makes them unattractive to you? Is it their color? Well, it has to be that. In Arizona, they’re asking Hispanics for their proof-of-citizenship or else they’re shipped over the border. Do you like that? I’ve “done it” with a guy with a severe birth defect and had a blast because he had the fun attitude towards play. I’ve “done it” with guys who are considered physical perfection by gay standards and had a horrible time. Face it, you’re a bigot. What you call “preferences” is actually prejudices. Until you do what you need to do to get with the act, you as a gay man will never have equality, and you as a Hispanic man will always be viewed as some illegal alien criminal. You support and participate in bigotry, so don’t whine when you get pushed out of this country. Find out what it is about your hate-filled personality that makes you a racist so you can be a credit to our orientation rather than a hinderance.
well, soulflame, not many people have empathy for their fellow humans — nor do they feel any obligation to.
(lack of empathy, and short-sightedness.
chronic conditions that affects more than just the recipients.)
i’m not trying to get everyone to like everyone else.
(that’s not reasonable, nor feasible.)
all i ask, is for respect, and for the fair judgment of the individual, as often as possible.
all i ask is for the honest acknowledgment of one’s biases for selection of a partner, if those biases are in fact controversial and potentially offensive.
(i don’t want to hear anything about, “oh, Saint, i can say that you’re sexist because you actively exclude women.”
i’m a fucking Gay: so i don’t exclude women out of spite or enmity; it’s done because that’s what i was programmed not to pursue, ostensibly from my conception.
at any rate, i hold myself open to the possibility that i might be with a woman at some point in the future, since i was able to discover within myself that my disinterest isn’t 100% Immutable; and i don’t feel obligated to pretend that it is, either, because of Peer Pressure.)
that’s one of the keys — being open to the Possibilities.
no matter how unlikely one believes one’s ever encountering The Unlikely might seem.
and not screwing yourself out of being able to any of enjoy them, because of some short-sighted, inflammatory, bridge-burning words you’d uttered.
it’s nothing to do with Political Correctness, because it really is not “all the same.”
i can justify my not having sexual interest in women*, generally, because i never really had such feelings within myself, and i don’t really want to force something that’s not there.
i can justify my not having sexual interest in the morbidly obese, almost entirely (at least 97.42%), because it seems i simply was born with the trait of being repulsed and discharmed by that much excess of fat — now, even though there is a general consensus (one which transcends through the demographs: even amongst those who, themselves, are in the same boat) that This is not an attractive condition, other peoples’ feelings about that level of over-weightedness had bore no influence on me.
Jerry you’re the epitome of ignorance and misunderstandings. First off how am I going to get pushed out of this country you insufferable moron. I was born here, passport, birth certificate, going to grad school here, how will I be deported? What country will I get sent to? You’re equating not being sexually attracted to someone as the exact same as being prejudiced against them. If I were to use that logic then you’re a sexist imbecile because, if you’re gay, you’re not attracted to women and thus must HATE women and want to keep them down and oppressed. If you say that’s incorrect then your logic and arguments are big failures, but that’s not surprising since you can’t differentiate between not being sexually attracted to people and hating them and being bigots based on that. I’ve had sex with black guys too, I said the majority just don’t do it for me to wanna jump in bed with them and how can I answer why I’m not attracted to some guys and not others? Why don’t you list your likes and dislikes and rationally explain how and why you feel a certain way. It’s not possible, at least not in every instance, sometimes we just like things and we don’t know why, kinda like how there’s no actually concrete reason why some guys are gay and some aren’t. So equating my attraction or lack thereof of some guys to the legislation and racial profiling in Arizona is a complete misunderstanding and a lack of any serious thought to what bigotry is and what the sometimes inexplicable attractions we have. I stand by my previous assertion that you, Jerry, are a complete twat.
I know what i like and turns me on, but i choose to leave my profile blank..
I respond to everyone who messages me. if i’m not into them then i’ll let them know by saying they’re not my type.. after saying this most guys have thanked me for being honest and not rude..
Not everyone will turn you on, but some guys just want a little respect and even if it’s not want they want to hear at least it’s the truth and you don’t just ignore them or delete the message
Couldn’t agree with Whatevz more, especially about Jerry being a twat.