Gay Ass Gossip: Happy 50th Birthday, George Clooney!

ITEM – Don’t hate George Clooney because he’s still beautiful at 50. Today is the former Facts of Life and Roseanne (what, those were important roles!) star’s birthday. Many of these celebrities are having their faces mutilated and rat poison injected into their mugs to fend off decay. The Clooney has no need for such measures. He’s all about the glass of whiskey, the cigar and the gorgeous whatever he’s banging.  I say “whatever” because I’m hoping he comes out late in life so I can fulfill that Roseanne threesome fantasy that stars me, him and John Goodman. *crickets* Wow, you’re all so judgey.

– J. Harvey

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ITEM – A story broke this week that Madonna…hold up. Wait. Guy Ritchie‘s a hot piece of ass, huh? Let’s go for a drink down the pub, and then back to your place for a shag, Guy. Anyway, resume story. Madonna reportedly made her then husband, director Guy Ritchie, get circumcised so he was in line with her Kabbalah beliefs back in the day. Come again? All of us cut males suffer SOME sort of neuroses by having part of our cranks removed as tiny innocent babies. No one needs to go there as an adult. NO ONE needs any sort of surgical tool near their dick unless absolutely necessary. I don’t even LIKE covered wagons but I wouldn’t be insisting people do it cuz’ Jewish mysticism ordered it so. The couple (obviously) divorced in 2008.

Oh, and get this. The Kabbalah Centre in LA is reportedly under investigation for some shady tax issues. Guy must be like “I got my dick cut for THESE people?”

ITEM – James Durbin and Scotty McGreery are the remaining two male finalists on American Idol after TOTALLY GAY (what is HE tryin’ ta pull?) Jacob Lusk got his ass booted this week. Several thousand tween girls think that 17-year-old McGreevy  is adorbs.  Although this is one of the few pics I could find of Scotty in which he wasn’t making wacky faces. What is up with the googly eyes and the creeper expressions when he sings? I’m surprised that Idol didn’t call in some sort of face coach for the lil’ crooner.

1,781 thoughts on “Gay Ass Gossip: Happy 50th Birthday, George Clooney!

  1. If Cary Grant had a son….I’m sure he would have looked like Mr. Clooney. Too bad he can’t sing like his Aunt Rosemary.(lol)

  2. hAPPY b day george -and I think you rock as a cool dude who’s a good man as well. All the best, hot stuff. Como Lake visit? Love to! Let me know when!

  3. Clooney is probably the only 50-year-old guy in the world I would do in a heartbeat. As Carrie Bradshaw says, like a fine wine, he just gets better with age.

  4. The only thing I want to say is that getting circumcised cuts down the chance of getting HIV by 60%. Yes, condoms work about 95% the time as well, but I would be willing to do anything possible to make sure I keep myself and others as safe as possible. Just something to think about.

  5. if Clooney were gay, and if he was on Manhunt, no one would give his profile a second glance cuz 50 is death in gaydom–sad, but true…
    happy BDay, though, George! 🙂

  6. Clooney is HOT, Guy Ritchie is WAY hot, especially now that I know he is cut LOL. The American Idol boys… EH. Thanks J. Harvey for another great blog.

  7. Remember that Geoge Clooney is Rosemary Cooney’s son (or nephew; can’t quite remember). Rosemary looked and sounded great well into her 70’s!

  8. Have always thought George Clooney was hot, and wouldn’t mind having sex with him.

    Years ago, while living in West Hollywood, met George, just before the opening of BATMAN, forgot what year it was?. OMG, he is just as fine in person, was very nice and cordial. His eyes are gorgeous up close. Said hello, mentioned was going to see the movie when it opened, and shook his hand.

    All I could think of as I drove off in my car, was that his hand was warm, had a nice grip, and that sometime earlier it was holding his own dick in the palm of it!! 😛

  9. re the uber-doable Mr Richie – I wonder what Madge threatened him with if he did not submit to mutilation..? shuuder. Come to Daddy, Guy

  10. To JC: I’m proud of my foreskin and I wouldn’t do anything to remove it! I ONLY play safe and that’s the most important strategy to keep myself and others as safe as possible. I’m aware of those research & studies, but im sure SAFE sex cuts down the chance of getting HIV by much more than 60%. After all, being circumcised is not a passport to play unsafe and remain neg. Just my opinion…

  11. @ J. Harvey,

    I certainly do NOT suffer from any form of neuroses whatsoever due to being circumcised as a baby. I have NO recollection of the procedure and to top it off, I personally have never and will never indulge in any form of sexual contact with uncircumcised men! Can anybody say eeeew? Yuck, and then some.

    I understand and respect that many men like/ prefer uncircumcised men but I do not. When I was single I of course came across a man or two who wasn’t circumcised and that was always a deal breaker for me. Seeing all that skin just hanging there is enough to make me loose my last meal and I imagine there must be a smell to it all [I don’t know this for a fact since I never got that close to one]. I can’t even watch a porn flick if the men are NOT circumcised.

    Granted, most of this says a lot more about me then about uncircumcised men, and is highly prejudicial and extremely narrow minded but it’s how I feel about it and therefore an honest depiction.

    In any case I just wanted to tell you that you mustn’t assume that you are speaking for all men, just as I’m aware of the fact that on this topic, I am very biased.

  12. To Rowin: all I can say is that you have NO IDEA what u are missing…. And I agree with u, regarding this topic, I’m very biased too 🙂

  13. Rowin: I’m glad that you acknowledge that you have a very distorted view of male genitalia. Most uncut dicks do not have excessive hanging skin (I agree that would be a major turnoff – personal opinion!) and the only time you’d have to worry about any potential for a pungent smell is if you were cruising them in a public park with no access to a bit of soap and water. btw most of us with our foreskins intact keep immaculate hygiene. Another well studied fact is that we typically have more sensitive glans as a cut cock is constantly exposed so the sensory nerves down regulate – reducing sensation. Personally I love being uncut and thank my parents for not mutilating me as child.

  14. @ DFBeto and Rob,

    Thank you both for your kind responses, I freely acknowledge that my view on this topic probably is distorted. As a dear [older] friend of mine likes to tell me time and time again: “You’ve got a lot of growing to do little caterpillar” [apparently this is a reference to some TV series] and as I’m still in twenties [just about] who knows how I’ll feel about it in a couple of years. I don’t think that much will change but who knows? The trouble is that my partner/ boyfriend [what do you call somebody you’ve been living with for the last 4-years? 🙂 ] is also circumcised and since we are in a monogamous relationship, I’m not free to experiment [so to speak]

  15. J Harvey if U R suffering from some type neuroses from having your crank clipped when U where a baby than I would also say that U R suffering from a serious psychological dis-order I 2 was circumcised at birth ( have physical or mental recollection of it ) I am N agreement with Rowin as never having attraction 2 uncircumcised men ( not a deal killer I am a TOTAL TOP !! ) Rob I thank my parents 4 having my crank MUTILATED as a baby 🙂 🙂 🙂 so that I could not ( as adult ) chat on M/H and make a bow tie of my cum soaked FORESKIN ;( 🙁 🙁 at the same time !!!

  16. I am sorry but that should have been NO physixal or mental recollection of it !!!

  17. I’m cut, could care less either way whether my partner is cut or uncut. It’s kind of sad that people get so up in arms about it. It’s not such a big deal, really.

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