Now y’all fancy panty-sniffers are probably wondering why there’s no reference to Dan Black‘s DICK in the title of this post. Well, child, my mouth and ass are already at FULL capacity with Adam Levine and Betty Who slamming me in each end. There ain’t NO room for Dan Black! And if he brought his gurl Kelis along, what are they gonna do? Stick their big floppy dicks in my nostrils? Nuh-uh. Ms. Boulangerié Knowles does NOT get down like that.
Plus, this ain’t even about dick. It’s about the MUSIC. Boulangerié is a true lover of the music and she knows her shit, so you better get RIGHT with your life and listen to what she’s got to say! You also better get a roll of Bounty paper towels for your pussy, because Dan Black’s new single “Hearts” is gonna get you SOAKING wet. It’s gonna put you up against a wall and Lance Armstrong the FUCK out of your man-clit. You gonna be like this:
GIRL! Those strings speak to Boulangerié’s soul, and that line about “all these broken people, their junkyard parts” is too deep, too deep, you gotta change the station. Dan Black is on some Coldplay meets the club shit, and I am LIVING for it. Plus, Kelis sounds slick as DICK with her vocals. If you need me for anything, I’ll be in the bath tub finger-twirling my coochie to this. LATER!
Don’t H8 me or try to ELIMIN8 me. Stay CUNT or die.
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Time lapse videos are always fun to watch. Really digging this song. He’s cute too.