My never-ending quest for the perfect sexy swimsuit may have finally come to an end. This morning, one of my delicious Twitter followers was kind enough to send me a link to the latest design from NYC-based brand Slick It Up, and while this might be a slight exaggeration, I am tempted to say that this kitten swimsuit has changed my life, made me a better man and single-handedly unlocked the secret to world peace.
Seriously, though! This swimsuit could only be better if it were shipped to me with an economy-sized bottle of lube, a lifetime supply of condoms, a golden butt plug and this particular Slick It Up model popping out of the delivery box, making demands that I immediately eat his ass until he cums.
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Do you think Slick It Up will send me a free sample if I promise to wear it until the end of time? I’m just putting that shameless question out there, hoping that they’ll see this post and give me the answer I want. As I anxiously sit by my computer awaiting their e-mail politely requesting that I stop asking for free shit, I’ll leave you with the brand’s four newest styles.
(Also, I wear a medium… You know, in case anyone is wondering.)
– Dewitt
Check out four new, sexy swimsuit styles from Slick It Up below:
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Is it even possible for a swimming trunk to look too ‘gay’? I mean, look at these!!!
I don t know, I just know that I want to play with pussy.
I love Slick It Up. Too bad their stuff is so overpriced – New Yorkers don’t know what things ACTUALLY cost – and it’s made in China anyway!
I like the look of them but the fit seems not so great in the front…but maybe that’s what makes them look so good in back. #confusing
To bad the guys R GORGEOUS but the underwear is HIDEOUS
whats the name of the big saheved head blue eyed model he is so freaking delicious
This shit makes me want to picket with Fred Phelps. How hard is it to meet a normal fucking gay guy???
Define “normal”.
One that isn’t a raging fucking narcissist dressing in nelly 17 year old chick underwear or a spiteful, hypocritical piece of shit like you. That answer your question? Eat Shit you plague on the gay community.
I don’t want a pussy anywhere near my boys, but to each their own
Oh, because CLEARLY what the gay community needs is judgmental ass-wipes who shame people for being who they are!
I didn’t receive that memo, so thank you for passing on that information.
I don’t care how hot the guys are if I saw one on the beach wearing a pair of these or at the poolside I know I would laugh and I am sure I would not be alone.
Would be a buzz kill as well seeing them on a guy before sex too.
Pretty sure if anyone was confident enough to wear any of these styles, they wouldn’t give a fuck if you or anyone else were laughing at them.
Going out of your way to attack your readers and or bloggers seems to have become a staple for you lately Dewitt why is this? I am picking on the swim wear like so many others here as well.
Just because you had an argument with “Dewitts Lisp Patrol” or put down by him here in this article doesn’t give you the right to blast others left and right!
It’s pretty far-fetched to say that I’m “attacking” you, so much as defending someone’s right to wear these swimsuits without fear of judgmental laughter.
You or anyone else can wear what ever you want of course as long as it is legal to do it in public but so is laughter if it looks funny on a person!
And yes lately you are quick to rebut anyone and everyone that says anything you don’t like or approve of like no one has the right to make any negative comment on anything you write!
I keep my mouth shut to a lot of posts and articles because I know they would be negative in nature about an individual and that is wrong and no need to say it. But not finding a piece of so called “Fashion” appealing and laughable come on!
His name is Thomas Canestraro. He used to be a personal trainer at my gym in NYC and he has been in the Expendables 3 movie. Google him.
Oops! I didn’t know I couldn’t speak my mind.
Fred Phelps died nearly a year ago, but you do seem to share some of his character traits.
I won’t laugh, but I will be shocked if anyone would PAY and then to wear this in the public! Maybe go-go dancers would wear this in the gay clubs, but can’t think of anyone who would be game. Oh maybe hookers would wear these as well or activists wearing them ‘ironically’…
Meh, whatever.
Props for the Madonna “Human Nature” quote.
Yeah, I got a reply from Dewitt! 😉
NOPE. Even if it was a decent price, it’s *gasp* only for skinny people. Their “large” is a 36″ waist, and that’s the biggest it seems they go. Fuck that.
I must have been crazy…
And yet you try and stop anyone from speaking theirs by blocking anything you disagree with you cunt.
What YOU don’t know could fill a warehouse. You are one of the biggest fucking judgemental hypocrites on the net. Utterly deluded, sad and fucking lonely guy.
Here’s a memo for you, you nasty little weed; No one wants to date a crazed, sex obsessed lisping queen who constantly objectifies men’s assholes and cocks. Nor do they want someone who has a fucking hissy fit whenever someone says something that they disagree with.
You are one pathetic individual. “Judgemental”…the irony.
Here’s a memo for you: I have been in a relationship for seven years, so I don’t care if anyone wants to date me. I am doing just fine, and you sound like the one who has the problem here.
Nope! I just block trolls. People disagree with me all the time and don’t get blocked.
I love every bit of this conversation.
It’s my favorite Madonna song. I know that’s sacrilege to true Madonna fans, but whatever, I was born this way.
Not sacrilege at all. It’s a good one. Not saying every Madonna song is a classic, but she’s had a lot of great songs and if that ones your favourite, it’s all good to me.
Ditto there Dewitt it’s all I wanted to do.
I’m sorry no need to call people names.
And note – I didn’t stop you from doing so! I merely provided a counterpoint to your original statement.
The purple shorts are cute…the cat makes me smile… Back in the 90’s I’d of had the looks / body for these…now I’m just too old and pudgey! Kudos to guys who can pull these off!
I love both of the square-cut shorts and the ‘Thumper’ ensemble. No – worrying what others think is something I made not my business long ago.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and it seems the negative commenters to this post are just jealous that they don’t have the body or the looks to pull off wearing these suits. Sad.
trunks that gay only look sexy on big handsome masculine men… they can pull em off and I wanna pull em off them
thanks hon