It’s here! It’s here, it’s here, it’s here! And by it, I mean hockey season. I care! Probably you don’t. But let me try to entice you.
Ogle with me a bunch of photos of my perennial favorite player, Henrik Zetterberg of the Detroit Red Wings. Here are some key stats that you need to know: he’s a really good player, his facial hair is thrilling, he turns 33 this Wednesday, and at some point, he somehow earned himself the nickname “Zetty the Grizzly Teddy.”
He is indeed a grizzly teddy, and he’s also a fucking dreamboat. Imagine if Jake Gyllenhaal and the young Jared Leto had a baby and that baby had a rugged body and a really nice beard. I’m sure he has no interest whatsoever in rimming dudes, but let’s dwell on that thought for a minute.
Ahhhhhhh.
Here are some photos I whip out whenever I want to think about this grizzly teddy mauling me in the woods. Some of them are recent, from this week’s season opener, and some of them go back years and years. My boner for this man knows no bounds, to the point where I even think he’s hot in that Hamburglar onesie. That photo was taken a few days before his 2010 wedding, at some kind of surprise nineteenth-century themed salt bath retreat. I don’t totally understand why that happened, but I’ve been to enough kooky concept weddings that I don’t judge anymore. Plus, this is probably the most we’ll ever see of his ass, unless he does the ESPN Body Issue one year. Which I don’t see happening, sadly.
– Lawrence
Scroll through some photos of Henrik Zetterberg below:
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I want to go to there.
Man, he could be Jake Gyllenhall’s brother!
He does have a very nice beard, but as a lifelong St. Louis Blues fan, I cannot support the Detroit Red Wings in any manner whatsoever.
Jesus. I need to watch more hockey, because that guy is like, everything I hold dear wrapped in one pretty package.
He’s cute…why are there so few available men who look like him in my dating scene?!
Go Wings! so glad the season started up this year and we get a full season of games!
I’ve met him a few times. He’s so dreamy that I got weak in the knees. He was very gracious when I tried to speak Swedish. And, his legs are thick, muscular and fantastic!
I, too, have this problem as a pens fan. I want his cock so badly, but I can’t.
I just can’t.
That’s exactly what I was gonna say.