Straight Guys Are Gay: Locker Room Booty Smacking

I have a friend who played college football, and it’s fun to ask him for homoerotic jock stories when we get drunk together. One day, I brought up all the ass smacking that goes on when you… touch it down or whatever in football. He chuckled and said it’s just sort of a reflex, and means absolutely nothing sexual. At least to HIM. He DID say that he had something called a “defensive line coach” who was REALLY into smacking their asses. In fact, I remember how he explained it:

“He would slap our asses for everything. You could say ‘morning’ to him, and he’d spank your ass. We all used to joke about how he probably had a paddle in his desk drawer that he wanted to use on us. When we went to take the field, he would PROPEL on to it you by smacking your butt. He even slapped a teammate of mine on the BARE ASS when he was changing one day. We’re pretty sure he got spoken to by coach after that.”

I probably went home from the bar and jerked off to that story. When I watched THIS player getting his bare asscheeks played like bongos, it brought back that wonderful tale.

– J. Harvey

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