RuPaul’s Drag Race: Face, Face, Face of Cakes

Beyond the wigs and glittery gowns of every drag queen, there lies a naked man. We were kindly reminded of this fun factoid on last night’s episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race, in which the remaining eight contestants posed for a tasteful nude photo shoot.

The queens then proceeded to use delicious cakes as inspiration for “high fashion couture” looks on the runway. And considering half of these bitches can hardly sew, there was much more “this looks like you were high” than high fashion. Not that we’re pointing any fingers.

Last but not least, this episode marked the debut of the “Heathers”, a four-way alliance that’s some combination of elitist, fabulous and downright cunty. These queens are sure to stir up some drama in the next couple of weeks, so if you’re not watching yet… You might want to start now!

– Dewitt

To watch this episode and check out the rankings, follow the JUMP:


CATCH UP: Episode 2 – The Queen Who Mopped XMas, Episode 3 – Queens In Space, Episode 4 -Totally Leotarded, Episode 5 – QNN News, Episode 6 -The Snatch Game


1. RAJA (LW – 2, Winner): Even with her lady garments peeking out, Raja rocked the runway with her chocolate lava cake couture. It’s just a shame that she can’t keep her mouth shut! We consistently hate to love her. That’s really all we have to say on this matter.

2. MANILA LUZON (LW – 3): Maybe it’s just our tendency to love everything Manila Luzon does, but we struggled to not put her in first place again. In the end, it was the nude photo shoot and washed-out zombie make-up that swayed our vote. But, um, that “Givenchy meets Jessica Rabbit” look was truly spectacular. Work it out, Ms. Carrot Cake!

3. YARA SOFIA (LW – 5): Alright, so the strawberry shortcake get-up didn’t come off as brilliant as we would have liked. With that said, we have to give Yara credit for going the extra mile and adding paint into the equation. Paint on her body. Paint on her dress. Not terribly original, but they made her stand out from the competition. Plus, we like that she managed to stay out of the backstage drama…

4. CARMEN CARRERA (LW – 6, Mini-Challenge Winner): Are we the only ones who had never seen a princess cake until this episode? Clearly, we weren’t alone on this, because Carmen’s design didn’t even come close to the original concept. It’s a good thing she looks really good naked.

Why, oh why, did this photo shoot have to be tasteful? We want to see her bent over a desk, popping her booty and seductively looking over her shoulder. Not that we’ve thought about this or anything. Whatever! She’s extraordinarily attractive as a dude. Don’t act like you wouldn’t hit it.

5. DELTA WORK (LW – 9): We kind of wish Delta would have shown off more skin. Look, even if you’re not into big guys, you’ve got to admit that the whole “fat girl” complex is holding her back. She already mentioned in this episode that she’s not comfortable with owning her weight. That’s fine and all. We get it. But could you stop being so safe and go all the way for once? Push the limits!

On a brighter note, this had to be one of Delta’s best moments in regards to style. Her rendition of angel food cake was a bit more costume than high fashion couture, but we’re glad she at least looked good and dressed in clothes that complimented her body type. Well played! Yet you (along with Carmen) have a lot of catching up to do if you’re gonna compete with the other Heathers.

6. ALEXIS MATEO (LW – 4, Chante, You Stay): Yawn, yawn, yawn! Alexis is such a sweetheart. Perhaps even as sweet as cheesecake. We’d love to hang out, grab a drink and bitch about the men in our lives. But, seriously, why are we so fucking bored by her? Let’s hope this near-elimination experience will light a match under her ass. She needs to turn it up, or turn it out… the door.

7. STACY LAYNE MATTHEWS (LW – 1, Sashay Away): You’ve got to give Stacy credit for at least the top of her red velvet cake design, right? We could defend her all day and night, but the fact of the matter is that you can tell she gave up during the lip-synch. Or she got too drunk on Absolut cocktails backstage. Both are possible.

8. SHANGELA (LW -8): Yes, Shangela is still in the competition. She will likely excel in next week’s stand-up comedy challenge. We don’t necessarily dislike her. That aside, it says a lot that no one was willing to stick up for her in last night’s episode. She’s clearly doing something wrong if she’s alienating all of her fellow contestants, including the ones who are supposedly her “friends”. Tone down the shade, gurl.

13 thoughts on “RuPaul’s Drag Race: Face, Face, Face of Cakes

  1. I wouldn’t have put Shangela at the very bottom. I do feel for her, she is hung up on everyone working with and around double standards. And she’s right, it isn’t fair, but life is not fair and there will always be double standards, she’s gotta rise above it. They always show queens helping each other, but they hold it against her especially.

  2. I don’t know why anyone’s surprised that they keep FORCING Shangela through. She is not at the same level as the rest, yet they are setting her up to win. I don’t know why they brought her back or why they keep defending her, but it’s obvious Ru wants her to win.

  3. It is very obvious that Ru wants her to win. I’m not just saying that because she’s the last Black queen standing, but umm…yeah, I am saying that. Shangela’s one-woman victim extravaganza last night was painful to watch. Girl, grow a pair and move on!

  4. Ooh girl really? “the last Black queen standing” I won’t even comment further. Raja and the Heathers are mean but they’re correct. Shangela is amateur compared to the talent this season and last season. I mean Billy B was right, Shangie’s makeup on the runway was ashy, not flattering and aged her quite a bit. Good luck. Hope she can mooch (sp?) off Alexis for a couple more episodes.

  5. Well maybe it’s because she is never on the giving end of that help only the taking. Maybe they don’t show that but it’s kinda what you pick up from what the other gueens say.

  6. What the hell is wrong with these queens? If I knew that I was going to be on this show, my ass would be in a sewing class the next day, makeup class after that and wig working after that. If they’ve watched the show ever they KNOW these are skills you need. Get out of victim mode and into self care. Nobody likes a leech.

  7. I don’t know why, but Raja annoys the crap out of me. I feel like she’s so arrogant about her skills, etc. And is this like the second or third time she’s worn a hood on the runway? Wear something different! But the judges seem to like her a lot. I’m hoping they notice the hood the next time she does it because I bet it will happen again.

    Also, I LOVE Eliza Dushku. You should have seen my face glow every time she was on the TV screen.

  8. SHANGELA has got to go. Where does she think she is competing????? In the Garden of Good and Evil? There is ony one Lady Chabli. His vocabulary is so limited, he can’t thread a sentance in his own defence. All he ever comes up with is “Ya’ got no “T””. C”mon Ru, I thought you wanted to elavate the illusion of Drag to a higher level, this “Southern Disgrace” is bringing the show down.

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