Yes, all four of them. I want to bang every single member of Coldplay, even though I can’t stand listening to their music. This never occurred to me until a shirtless picture of bassist Guy Berryman (as seen above) started making the rounds yesterday afternoon. Like, I don’t know if you people have eyes, but this guy is HOT. He’s so HOT that I have to type it in capital letters. There’s no other choice.
My enthusiasm for Berryman and his nipples led to a mad search for more pictures of the band. In doing so, I was surprised to learn that they’re all kind of attractive. Yes, even fucking Chris Martin. It’s not like I’ve never seen him before, but there was something about seeing him in the context of the full band that made me want to tie him up, shove a ball gag in his mouth and pound him senseless. I’m not a kinky person. He just brought it out in me.
Then, of course, we have lead guitarist Jonny Buckland and drummer Will Champion. Both of these men regularly rock beards or a bit of scruff, which loosely translates to “I would probably sit on their faces”. Preferably, I’d have a threesome with them… I could even use Will’s drum sticks to probe both of their slutty holes at the same time, as they sing at the top of their lungs “Every Cumshot Is A Waterfall”.
Wait, what? Why is Coldplay bringing out this side of me? If it’s any comfort for you, I’d stick to plain ol’ sweaty man sex with Berryman. He would obviously be the bottom. I mean, let’s be real—all the dudes in Coldplay are bottoms, whether they know it or not. Fact.
– Dewitt
To check out some pics and their latest video, follow the JUMP:
CHRIS MARTIN (Lead Vocalist & Fan of Gwyneth Paltrow’s Vagina):
JONNY BUCKLAND (The Sometimes-Cubby Lead Guitarist):
WILL CHAMPION (The Often-Cubby Drummer):
GUY BERRYMAN (Bassist & Token “Hot One”):
GROUP SHOTS:
FYI: I prefer them without the elephant suits.
In my opinion, the guy in the first picture sitting in the vehicle is sexy and attractive. I definitely could date a guy that look like him.
damn – they could rock my boat. I think they are hot and I loved the song. I had not heard them before but I would be their stage “hand” anyday!!! mark me a new fan and i would do the whole band!!!!
The band you want to be looking at is Paramore.
Jeremy Davis, and Taylor York!! holy hell they are hot.
Not even a secret
Bass players are always hot.
Yeah, I’d definitely be a groupie for Coldplay. Actually, Chris Martin was one of my very first “rock star” crushes and even though my feelings about their music waxes and wanes over time my feelings have yet to change.
An orgy wouldn’t be bad with all four of them.
WooHoo!!! The video was shot in South Africa!!!!
Will Champion. Love him.
Yup. I agree.
Except I’d shout it from the rooftops.
I guess they have a kinda sexy, white -supremist look (?) :-(~LOL
any of the three NOT currently involved with gwynneth’s vagina are really hot. and i would be all for a champion berryman sandwich…. and since i would hate for buckland to get lonely, he could come play too…