Carly Rae Jepsen: “Call Me Maybe”

Laugh out loud! I have a deep loathing for the internet acronym “LOL”. So few people really mean it, you know? In this particular case, I’m spelling it out for you, to draw attention to the hilarious idea that we’d post this Carly Rae Jepsen music video without any ulterior motives.

Sure, it’s a catchy song that’s heating up on pop radio, but do any of us actually care about that shit? Nope. There’s a muscular, shirtless dude in the video, and he’s serving up a steaming platter of sex, sex and more sex. <– Pretend that sentence was sexier.

His name is Holden Nowell, and he could mow my lawn whenever he wants to… Just kidding. He’s waaaaaaay too pretty for me. But I guess I’d stick it in him just to see how tight he is? Maybe I’d lick his balls? Tickle his coin purse? I’m still not sure. I’ll get back to you on that matter.

– Dewitt

Click through to listen to “Call Me Maybe” see sexy pics of Holden Nowell: