Oh, Super Gay Hero. What would we do without you? Suffer through a world bereft of cheesy porn parodies, that’s what! The spankable Aspen, the grrrrriffic Griffin Barrows, and Kaden Alexander of the juicy DSLs get their three-way on in a galaxy far, far away. And trust me, this scene is way less depressing than that Rogue One business. No one dies and three hot dudes fuck and get each other off. [insert lightsaber as dick substitute joke here]!
There’s more below, and I really wish I could write this post in the famous Star Wars crawl that opens all of those flicks. Except Rogue One. What gives? What the fuck was that? Tradition, people!