In recent years, straight men have really discovered their value as sex objects. Now more than ever, dudes are getting on various social media platforms, losing their clothes, and acting like total tramps. This time in history is the best time. Fuck polio vaccines and Maude! It’s the Age of Straight Dude Sluttery! The “Grind On Me” phenomenon is a perfect example. Shirtless men have taken to the Internet to show off their humpin’ skillz to Pretty Ricky’s “Grind With Me”. Here’s how you do it:
1. Have a nice body and positive opinion about yourself.
2. Turn your cap backwards, wear slinky gym shorts, and lack a shirt.
3. Deftly dive onto your floor or any flat surface, landing on your hands, and slide into the missionary position.
4. Hump that floor until it catches fire! Bounce those cheeks! Rub up on it with your package! That linoleum/utility carpeting/asphalt/hard wood (wink, wink)/grass should scream for mercy!
Easy, right? Enjoy this “best of” collection via YouTube below. And then watch a Vine from a beefy young man who should have been included! That’s not #comedy, that’s #Iwannatapthatfatass!
– J. Harvey
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give me a call when they start doing it buck nakit..then I’ll gladly watch the vid…
i love this
It’s too blatant to be genuinely sexy. Very forced. And the biggest problem of all is that these guys have a WAY TOO positive opinion about themselves. They probably watch themselves in the video more than anyone else does!
i finially get why they call sometimes call a vagina a carpet now………….hehe
why are the majority of these guys wearing black sox? not that i’m complaining mind you….