Why Are You Wearing Clothes, Andrew Garfield?

Dear Andrew Garfield,

It has recently come to my attention that you are wearing clothes in your new spread for VMAN magazine. Why? Now that you’re potentially becoming a huge star with The Amazing Spider-Man, you need to be aware of all of your fans. Wearing a shirt, pants or any other garment is a crime against the gay male community. Especially when your ass looks like this.

In the name of everything that’s good in the world, we’d ask that you please consider being more naked in future shoots. It’s for the benefit of mankind, particularly the portion of mankind that would like to jerk off to shirtless and/or naked pictures of you.

Thank you for your time,

– Dewitt

Photo credit: Inez & Vinoodh

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