Things were flaming on last night’s episode of America’s Next Top Model. The ten remaining contestants walked the runway in designs by Geoffrey Mac, who J. Alexander helpfully reminded us (at least five or seven times) has worked with Lady Gaga. We should also mention that their hands were lit on fire. Because, um, that’s probably an important detail.
For the main challenge, the girls paired up (again) for a fake commercial for Fierce Roast Coffee. Thankfully, this was nowhere near as painful as last cycle‘s H2T beverage ads, as the models were dolled up in a retro 1950s style. So we know the question on everyone’s mind–who went home? Who rocked this shoot? And why do we even bother recapping this show anymore?
– Dewitt
To check out some pics and read more, follow the JUMP:
1. KASIA (LW – 4): It was almost a given that Kasia would win this challenge. She practically embodies the concept of 1950s sexy, in the sense that she actually has, well, curves. The chemistry between her and Jaclyn was pretty damn dynamic. Seriously, they should both be cast in small roles on Mad Men or something.
2. HANNAH (LW – 6): Oddly, we weren’t as impressed with Hannah as the judges were. It might just be that we didn’t like the way they styled her hair. Like, how come Alexandria got this really awesome up-do, yet Hannah’s rocking a very subtle blond waviness? We craved a bit more secretary realness.
3. JACLYN (LW – 5): Gurl! Guuuuuurl! We’re saying “girl” with a “u” because we can’t get over our obsession with Jaclyn. From the beginning of the episode when she was all excited about firefighter’s hoses, right down to her sultry walk at the Geoffrey Mac show. Her baby voice was perfect for this commercial. And can someone please send us GIFs of her booty drops during the judging panel? We’ll pay you back with a million blowjobs or finger bangs. THNX.
NOTE: Jaclyn was also the inspiration for today’s quote of the week–“They put a booty in your booty?” We’re not sure how we can work this into our everyday conversations, but we’re going to do our best to make it happen.
4. DALYA (LW – 8): The judges criticized Dalya for her “locomotion” in this clip with Molly. Whatever, y’all! Her body language, even when she wasn’t being filmed, was perfect for this part. There was this very frigid elegance to it all, if that makes any sense at all…
5. MONIQUE (LW – 7): The only note we have on Monique is “Shangela”. This was in reference to the smug glances they cut to every time Alexandria does something wrong. It’s good to know that this cycle’s contestants are willingly falling into their reality show cliches.
6. MOLLY (LW – 2): We’re not sure why we chose this particular image of Molly. Perhaps we wanted to call attention to the fact that they took out her monstrous “this may or may not eat someone’s face off” weave? But only perhaps. Honestly, we don’t have much to say about her performance. She looked great in the commercial, but we didn’t really buy her whole acting schtick.
7. MIKAELA (LW – 9): It’s so frustrating that Mikaela has been towards the bottom of the pack. Her facial features are just so gosh darn interesting, and it’d be a shame if she were sent home just because she’s not living up to her potential. Give us more! Give us more!
8. BRITTANI (LW – 3): Poor Brittani. The girl got paired with this cycle’s token crazy, domineering bitch-ho, and she nearly had a mental breakdown on set. While she may not be much of an actress, we’re still rooting for her in the long run. That haircut alone deserves to win this competition.
9. ALEXANDRIA (LW – 1): Pictured above, you will see the first moment when I actually believed in Alexandria’s fierceness. It was a pure epiphany, in which it became clear that she may have more purpose than dramatic editing. Can she tone down her attitude and controlling personality? Probably not. Will it cost her a cover for Italian Vogue? Most likely.
ELIMINATED: SARA (LW – 10): This was a shame. Then again, we’d be much sadder about Sara’s exit had she never used the word “femcore”. By the way, did Sara mention that she’s a feminist? Who’s worked her whole life to overcome the image of women as docile and sexy? Just pointing it out, in case you missed it.
HA! I love that I come back to Manhunt and get my LOLs from my favorite show re-caps. I was hoping that Alexandria’s attitude would’ve sent her packing and save poor, FemCore Sara but alas, the show’s Token Crazy is great television.
the whole on fire thing was a new low. I didn’t think it was possible for this show to hit new lows at this point. It is such a cartoon now. I don’t even believe Alexandria is really a bitch. She’s just mimicking bitches of the past to get air time. Now Jade from way back….that was a real bitch..lol
No comments about Francesco’s hotness dewitt? color me surprised 🙂
You forgot to mention how fiiine Francesco Carrozzini was looking in this episode
MOLLY and BRITTANI as the final 2!
I’m also surprised you didn’t mention how hot the photographer was!
Especially after all the models and then Tyra mentioned it.
WTF is femcore? Sounds like a vagyna
The biggest low? When Tyra punk’d the girls into thinking they went home, the other ‘contestants’ weren’t paid actors!! A bunch of girls thought their dreams were gonna come true only to have them crushed five minutes later.
Francesso was really hot. And i was sad to see Sara go. Even though she wasn’t a good model, she was quirky and fun.