Ten Things We Learned From Zeb Atlas’ “Love Hangover”

If you need further proof that the world is ending in 2012, look no further than Zeb Atlas‘ cover of “Love Hangover”. The porn star and bodybuilder has tackled the hit song by Diana Ross, and it’s a surefire sign of the apocalypse. How did Pearly Gates (a former member of 1960s girl group The Flirtations) get involved with this? We’re not entirely sure.

Truthfully, we’re pretty flabbergasted by the mere existence of this music video. We could have sat here for hours coping with our mixed reactions, but we eventually decided to do something productive. Like, um, making a list of ten things to learn from all of this! Whatever, don’t judge us just because we live by a different definition of “productive”.

– Dewitt

To check out our list and watch the video, follow the JUMP:

1. Wear headphones in public: People will think you’re a legitimate musical artist.

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2. Zeb Atlas is really strong: He can rip his shirt open, you guys!

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3. However, he really can’t dance: Also of note–we all have bad angles.

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4. Talent will not rub off on you: Even if you stand next to a sassy black woman.

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5. We will endure anything to see a hot dude covered in bubbles: For real.

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6. Some people’s tubs look like the inside of a limousine: Utterly fascinating.

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7. Um, only you can prevent forest fires?: Smokey the Bear would be proud.

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8. Zeb Atlas should never be allowed to shave his body: It’s a free country, but…

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9. This woman has nice teeth: Seriously, she should be in Colgate commercials!

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10. Zeb Atlas really can’t sing: Well, this is certainly surprising…

672 thoughts on “Ten Things We Learned From Zeb Atlas’ “Love Hangover”

  1. when a porn star is doing a breakout beyond just sex – i hail it. not 10/10 but i really liked it, entertaining and sexy fun,
    so – if you watched it to the end – don’t be bathmouthing it with badass jams – you had to like it for what it was – beefcake entertainment. Now to have an all gay hardcore porn animation short or 40. Know of any? Gay adult cartoons. ???? uuuummm good!

  2. His singing is better than her lip-synching. Catchy song though, and we could do with a few more muscle bodies like that in pop.

  3. Golly Gee, I hope that he does NOT sit around waiting for the “Dancing with the Stars” scouts to call… I was embarrassed for him and couldn’t stand to watch the rest of the clip.

    The good news: At least he has some hair on his chest in a few shots!

    But he does absolutely nothing for me on any level. He appears to be almost a caricature of a man. And no, I do not even remotely look like him nor do I have a body like that. So you posting queens can move on if you want to rip me apart for saying this. I don’t need to be a painter to recognize amazing talent in art. Nor do I need to be a chef to know what tastes good. He might be a great guy with a super personality. If he is that, he’s done a terrific job of hiding that from his viewers.

    As a photographer, if I were to shoot a person like him, my main challenge would be to capture him in a way that would make him look real and human. But maybe that’s not his thing. If so, I get it.

  4. Did I just get “Punk’d”? ROFLMFAO!!! If this is not a joke, Mr Atlas should stick to sucking cock. He’s not that good at it, but at least he wouldn’t be able to sing!

  5. OMG!! Really???!!! This wasn’t a joke??? aaaaaaahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaa !!! WOW!! Was he actually paid to do that, & Pearly, really???!!!! How badly did you need to work? Why didn’t they just let her sing the song?? Wow, I am in, I just can’t…I….I…

  6. someone’s got him a sugar daddy that can afford to let me do vanity pieces like this. And quite frankly, he’s no worse than Justin Beiber.

  7. You know, he and Reiken (sp?) from “A List of New York” should get together and sing a duet. It could literally be the worst song ever recorded in the history of ever.

    The bubble bath shots are over by 0:30. The remaining 3 minutes of this video should be banned by the United Nations as cruel and unusual punishment.

  8. this shit blew my mind….kinda disappointing to see the guy I’ve been jerking off to since i was about 14 queening out like that

  9. wow – that was like looking at a car crash, impossible to look away! i haven’t cringed that much for a while. awkward.

  10. This is trash, I can’t believe it got made although i can easily believe that it could’ve been worse.

  11. Well THAT was uncomfortable to watch. Are those arms inflatable?? (coz he should let some air out…seems they are interfering with his dance skills) Love the song tho’

  12. For a first try at something new it was not all bad it was a raw cut that need to be worked on. A few voice lessons and maybe a good dance coach and he may be good for a small record or two to be played in a gay bar video. He has the look just need to work on the talent some.

  13. …Holy jeebus, he seriously has absolutely no sense of rhythm. Also there was more auto-tune used in that 3 minutes and 25 seconds then in an entire episode of glee, which is saying something.

  14. are you talking about the Zeb Atlas song? i just watched it on YouTube. Zeb could be headed for the mainstream Hollywood studios at the rate he’s going…..he and Ben Affleck (or Ricky Martin) would make an interesting couple…..(0n or off screen)!!! people may be put off by his body language which to me indicates a certain level of discomfort. relax, Zeb! you’re gorgeous, generous, a smart business man, and you CAN sing. Hollywood, make room for something a little different…..

  15. Wow- Pretty harsh posts here. I am a Zeb fan, think he is an amazing looking man. As for the video and song.. I give him credit for trying a new medium, and have heard and watched a lot worse. Why the hate guys? It also does not hurt that I have a strong attachment to the song too..

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