While my dear co-blogger is pimping me out to give Jon Stewart blowjobs, I have other items on my “having sex with political satirists” agenda. Such as? Doing Stephen Colbert so hard up the butt that he can’t walk for seven million days. Think about it. I haven’t.
I mean, yeah, he’s a straight and happily married man. But I’ve had a huge crush on Colbert ever since he played closeted teacher Chuck Noblet on Strangers With Candy. I’ve imagined our passionate, late-night trysts on multiple occasions…
We’d fuck like bunnies (duh). Then, as soon as we’re done, I’d kick him out of bed right away. He’d look up at me from the floor, clutching onto his pre-cum stained American flag boxer shorts and begging to stay for more. To which I’d reply, “I’m not pushing you away. I’m pulling me towards myself.”
– Dewitt
To check out some more pics of Stephen Colbert, follow the JUMP:
And then there’s this GIF:
I’m pulling me towards myself. Love it.
Bahahaha Stangers With Candy! Yes!
Oh My God! Strangers With Candy!! I had forgotten all about that!
gross gross gross
loved “strangers with candy” – but colbert is fugly – utterly, painfully unattractive
@JDressler – “fugly” doesn’t do him justice, he actually isn’t attractive enough to be called “fugly”!!
I totally agree with Dewitt. He’s super sexy. And he’s a comic genius
Also agreed with Dewitt – I WORSHIP Colbert. He’s so hot, he makes me teeth sweat!
One question, though- why didn’t you also post the pic from the “Ask Jerri” episode where his pants clung tight to his butt? My head orgasmed when that image came over my screen and my body wasn’t far behind it. Great pics, though. His upper body even looks better in those skate pics than it probably did on SWC.
i think he’s so hot. totally agree!
all right.
i’ll admit it: in a strange way, old stevie is looking pretty hot in those first two pictures.
i guess, when viewed under that particular light, i might consider swapping Beej with the guy after all.
yup.
Strange way?