If you’ve ever used Manhunt, you’ve probably had this experience. You open your inbox to see a message with a subject heading like “u looking?” or “sup”. Then, as soon as you open it, you realize the rest of the message is completely blank. This person didn’t even bother to tell you how much they want to fuck you. They just sent a subject heading and nothing else.
When messaging someone on Manhunt, it’s important to actually… well, write a message. This isn’t rocket science, folks! If you’re just trying to get someone’s attention, you might as well just wink or unlock your pictures for them. Quite frankly, most men will prefer an actual message over these methods. What are your thoughts on this? Has this ever happened to you?
– Dewitt
Photo credit: Next Door Twink
To check out some entirely unrelated pictures of Ryan Middleton, follow the JUMP:
I actually prefer a bit of witty banter than the usual ‘sup’. Agrivates me when the message field is empty, and usually makes me ignore messages from that user in the future.
one of my biggest pet peeves. A simply “Hey, hows your day going?” is fine… don’t just say “sup” or unlock your pictures without saying anything!!
I think it’s weird how so many guys have issues with winks or short messages.
These are just conversation starters – it’s what you do afterward that matters.
A lot of times guys aren’t even at their computers. A lot of times a short message or a wink is simply trying to find out if he’s even there or not.
I think these guys with issues with winks and short messages need to lighten up. I just don’t think it’s that big of a deal. Is it so hard to be flattered that your profile caught someone’s attention? I say just be happy and try to make the best of it. He may be a very sweet, sexy, fun guy, but your snap judgement will prevent you from ever finding out.
Great point
Simple statement means…”hook up n fuck”…chatter is …”let’s be friends”…depends what u r wanting as well…fuck or friend…
Exactly @ Ricky. I’m on Manhunt to fuck. I honestly careless about being your friend. If it happens afterwards, great. But there is nothing more annoying than a guy who wants to talk and have dinner and “coffee”. Equally annoying is someone who sends an email to you and they expect you to answer it, even if they have no interest in you. Unless there is an equal attraction, then I don’t owe him anything. Why can’t people take a hint that the feeling isn’t mutual and move on? And yes, it has happened to me and I cut my loses and continue the hunt. Why waste time with all this formal stuff when your pictures are already of you naked, let’s just cut to the chase here. If you want great conversation and romance, join EHarmony….
I’m with Ricky and J: Strangers on the internet owe you nothing. Why am I going to spend my time writting an entire unique paragraph for one guy who’s more likely to view my profile then delete the message because I’m not his specific type than to actually just read the message?
And ever notice that the guys who want something more than just “what’s up?” usually have vague profiles that say little more than “Say more than ‘what’s up?'” for profile text in the first place? How can they expect you to write something tailored just for them?
Whether it’s “sup?” or a whole dissertation, it all boils down to the same message: “Your pics caught my eye and I’m sexually attracted to you.” I’m not exactly looking for an outstanding personality or mind on Manhunt.
if someone is not interested, is it really that difficult and a hassle to send a message saying, “no” or “not interested” instead of leaving them high and dry. And eHarmony wouldn’t allow gay men and women to join their site, they got sued and now do have a something, but it is separate from eHarmony, completely different site. Manhunt isn’t just a site for hooking up, Manhunt, i.e. cruise, chat, connect, :hunting’ may that be for a date a friend or a hookup. MH includes all of it, but guys mostly use it for hooking up, not the number one purpose.
I have found manhunt to be completely useless for meeting people
Its not so much about the short message, I actually like the short little message to get things going.
But when there is nothing in the actual message and just the headline just says lazy to me if you cant type “Hey, whats going on?”. If nothing else repeat the headline and say “SUP” in the message itself.
I’ve had cases where they typed whole sentences in the subject line, and then nothing in the message itself. Now, that is annoying
I’ve had cases where they typed whole sentences in the subject line, and then nothing in the message itself. Now, that is annoying
“hey hows you?”
“Pretty good thanks! Blah blah blah exposition. How about you?”
“not bad thnx”
“Oh. Okay.”
Manhunters are the worst conversationalists.
Also, empty messages are irksome.
“I WASTED A MESSAGE VIEW ON THIS!? FFFFFFFFFFFFF-“
This sort of goes along with one of the topics from a few weeks back regarding guys not responding back…if all a guy gives me to work with is ‘sup (which I hate…spell out all the correct words if you want to catch my attention) or “hi”, I cannot really followup with anything…I let my subscription to this site expire awhile back, so I have a limited number of messages I can send a day…I am not going to waste them on a guy who is pre-Neaderthal and cannot write a complete sentence to express why he wanted to get my attention in the first place…remember guys, if you are making the first move and sending out a message to catch a guy’s attention (whether for a meaningless quick “shag” or to meet like human beings and talk before having sex), it only takes a minute ot two to dash off a couple of complete sentences to explain why you wanted to send a message in the first place! Personally, I like the “wink” feature…that is easiest if a guy is not sure about a “match” regarding “types”…if that goes unanswered, then that’s that and no harm, no fowl…but if you are inspired to actually type anything at all, remember that “first impressions” mean a great deal…I like intelligent men who can hold up their end of a conversation…sending me a message that simply says “hi” in the subject line with nothing in the body of the message does not overly impress me…I am not shallow and I have a variety of “likes/types”…but if a guy doesn’t stimulate me mentally, nothing else is happening, shag or more…
My profile has everything you need to know about me. Clear pics, stats, and what I’m looking for and what I’m not looking for. It clearly states I’m not here to make a BFF. If someone wants something other than that, I ignore them.
I think the only times a guy has an issue with this is if he’s not interested in the sender. I mean, think about it. If a guy you think is hot sends you a one word e-mail, or even just unlocks his pics, do you really care about the initial contact? If you’re into him, you’re happy he contacted you, and you respond accordingly.
Like someone else mentioned, I’m usually not at my computer if I’m on MH. You know the profile field where it says availability and I listed “Ask Me”? Yeah, I expect you to…you know…ask me.
People who just automatically unlock = automatically deleted. I know not everyone has an “Ask Me” field in their profile so they can’t claim the same but I can relate to coming back from AFK and opening my inbox only to find it’s filled with a bunch of “So and so has unlocked their pics for you”s.
However, I can also relate to the other side. I don’t want to have coffee or talk about philosophical subjects in a message on MH. I absolutely hate guys who dance around the subject. We’re all here for one thing…else we’d be on another ‘serious’ dating website.
Solution? Just write a friggin’ message and say “Hey” in the subject field and “What’s up?” in the message field to please both sides.
You don’t have to write a paragraph. Just a sentence to say what your interested in. Not just a simple wink or was up in the subject. Especially when there isn’t crap in your profile.
It is absolutely true that strangers on the internet don’t owe each other anything. The same goes for strangers anywhere for that matter. None of us owes anyone else anything, but maybe if we took the time to be a little more interested in each other, we would also be more interesting to each other.
damn you queens are goin at it like flies on shit. well im all for the friends with benefits and it pisses me off that the friends part doesn’t get fulfilled. sorry if i can’t have one ongoing conversation with you then you are either a)an asshole b)boring as fuck or c)both. oh and the guy in the pic is sooo adorable!
Although I know this site like any other gay chat site is mostly about hooking up and not the actually chat. I find it interesting how many guys will check you out after you send them a message. They see your pic or maybe just maybe actually read your profile. Then won’t bother to reply back with a simple thanks but not interested. What makes me laugh is when they “say” they are seeking something new and different and yet they still won’t give you the time of day if you are not hot enough for them.
But sending a message saying “sup” or “looking for” is just lazy. Most guys don’t want to read anymore they just want to fuck and maybe talk later if they enjoyed you!!
Also when they have no face pic only body shots but ask that you please have one before contacting them is a contradiction!
mmmmm this dude look good,would love to sniff those Balls,before actions 🙂
Personally, I’m all about actual messages. It’s not about some stranger owing someone else something, if that was the case… no one would message anyone. It’s about respect, if a PERSON takes the time to message you, a polite “thanks” or “no thanks” or whatever should be given. I mean, I’m pretty sure everyone who’s on this site has had the experience of someone else snubbing them, and honestly if this is a “community” it shouldn’t be encouraged. And as for saying something… read the profile first, there’s nothing more rude than receiving a message or an IM from someone who wants to plow you, when your profile says you don’t hook up or vice versa. Which again falls back to that little respect thing that so many people on here don’t understand.
Do you guys who are just looking for a fuck say that in your profile or do you assume it is implied because of the site name? So many gay guys like to play little fucking games. Be clear about what your looking for in your profile, or perhaps that requires typing too much.
Well I like to delete and pretend I never received the message.
anyone else find this guy eerily similar (though less attractive) than kurt wilde? seriously… EERIE!
Manhunt is only a start of “something?”. Whatever that “something” is. What happens after Manhunt is unknown until it does or doesn’t happen. Manhunt doesn’t guarantee anything 😉 And, a relationship is alot more complicated than Manhunt. SO, Lighten-Up, LOL !
Very well stated John! When I see a profile that says they hate winks I guess I interpret that as “I hate winks from ugly guys I’m not gonna be attracted to”
I am sure that if that same guy gets a wink from a super hottie stud, they won’t even remember that’s how the first contact happened. They will just jump on it and go for the sexy hook-up as fast as possible.
I am going to make a broad generalization, but it’s probably true:
Guys who hate winks are arrogant judgemental jerks.
Guys who are flattered by getting a wink are easy going down to earth intelligent people.
I couldn’t agree more…
I actually ask people to elaborate beyond these kinds of responses on my profile, but a lot of people just ignore that.
This is one of the best tips you have offered…
Or maybe it’s just that people are passing the buck… they’re putting the onus on the recipient to start the conversation, which seems like a chickenshit way of doing things. Don’t get me wrong, I’m certainly not on manhunt for dating, a relationship or anything more than sex. I’ve just realized that often the guys who are boring in their messages are boring in the bedroom.
I find its true that it really depends on the sender as to my reaction to the method (hehe shallow fag) but I do overall find the wink, the unlock with no message, or the solitary “sup” to be kind of lazy. Are you that lazy in bed too? If youre interested in me, dont hand off the ball for me to carry at the start….
It’s not really that much of a big deal to me. I think RickyCarey and John N. made the best comments about this issue yet and I completely agree. (And I’m not surprised they got the most “likes”) All this generalization about being “lazy in messaging means you’re lazy in bed”, etc. is just ludicrous to me. LOL. In my experience, there’s absolutely no correlation between what guys say in messages and profiles and what they turn out to be in reality. Some guys’ messages are just a reflection of who they are in person like myself: shy (but could be a tiger in bed). Some of my best hook-up experiences consisted of a few short email exchanges within a few minutes; some the opposite. Somebody mentioned this already but what I (and I think most guys on here) truly care about are the pictures (that are real and ACCURATE), stats, what you’re into, lack of assholeness and, most ultimately, CHEMISTRY. Most could not care less about the manner of initial communication.
ya know..
..maybe when a guy sends a single wink your way, you can just wink back at him (if you think you might be interested in meeting him).
chances are, at that time, the fella will then feel confident enough to write a full message to you, telling you what he’s seeking. (on websites that have restrictions on in-site messaging, people don’t want to use up their messages on people who
• aren’t interested
• won’t respond.
i’m not bothered by winks.
i will have plenty of opportunity to gauge if an individual is “lazy,” as opposed to just strategic, efficient, and cautious.)
but if that wink is the first and last thing he transmits, you’re not obligated to “inquire further.”
i guess, alternatively, if a guy just up and unlocks his pictures, without preämble, you can just return an equally-as-quick wink, if you like what you see.
doing so will put the reasonable onus of Conversation back onto your suitor.
and if he does nothing further, then you can write him off as lazy.
on another note: you can talk to us about the importance of “writing actual messages on Manhunt” when the non-payers don’t have to count each transmission (both out•going and incoming) carefully.
If you’re not a member, it’d be a waste of your few profile looks and messages to tell someone you’re not interested. Maybe we should wonder how many people aren’t responding because they can see they’re not interested from the name-“visited” match and just delete without wasting an email.
I love the winks and unlocks myself but I agree with Dewitt, if you’re going to go thru the trouble of sending an email, say something. It doesn’t have to be a book or love letter but do make it worth the effort of opening the email. Of course the guys who send those messages are also the ones that have “I never know what to put here so I’ll do it later” in their profile with “ask me” as every answer. Complete your profile (dick will still be here when you’re done) and then if you’re interested in someone, throw them a compliment and be direct. With so many options on here, if you don’t get someones attention, they’re on to the next bigger/better thing and you’re left alone…again…and whining.
rainbowsplash1 is right on the money i get it when some guys dont want to be friends just say that on ur profile and ill ignore you i like people in general and gay guys need support in this small community it sux to be alone and if ur not wanting a relationship at the moment for whatever reason. so be but dont be an asshole beacause someone has just completly opened and exposed themselves to you they do have somewhat of a right for a converstation and possible friendship. humans are born to be social not isolated. So if you have a problem with that, Fuck U and ur damn loneliness ur sad human beings who are only good for being objectified because ur not willing to open up as a person just ur asshole
@John >> You have spoken it all. Nobody will ever complain if Todd Sanfield happen to send you a “sup” blank email. So what is hypocrisy here?
True story.
True story.
He looks like a hobbit.
He looks like a hobbit.
i agree with this comment (along with some of the others). i know how to carry a conversation and if you don’t, it’s strike 2 of 3. but if you’re really hot, momma din’t raise no fool.
i think one point that you are missing is that you assume the wink-sender is a real guy. i’d say about 80% of them are either meth-heads or role-players. they try to suck as many guys into their game as quickly as they can. and they have no intention of following thru. so anyone who sends a wink is immediately suspect.
if you’re too lazy to write, i’m too lazy to reply (unless you’re really hot). if you can’t carry a conversation and you need to learn how, i can’t help you much and it’s not my job (unless you’re really hot). if you don’t fill out your profile, i don’t have patience to figure you out (unless you’re really hot).
When I see a guy I like at a bar, I say hi. If he likes me he responds with a hi, and then we go from there. I don’t however give him my CV in the first sentence. Its much the same here. Lets see if each others look appeals to us and then we can talk as we please. Same with winks. Thats why profiles with face pics and a significant profile text work better.
That said, if you want to take the time to write a full message, great, I appreciate it. Its not really a always or nothing deal, more just a better or worse. If you’re a hunk, and all you say is hi, I’m more than happy to reply to you. Your looks were enough to catch my attention. If however I’m more on the fence about you, then having read a well written message increases the chances I’d reply.
In the end, its all about getting the other guy interested. If your pictures are enough to do that, then by all means wink and unlock away. If not, then your words can add to your pictures, sometimes so much so that I’d fuck a guy who I’d never give a second look to if based just on his pictures.
The guy in the picture is cute with a hairy hole. Very nice!
Amazes me all the fussing over,”Say something!”
How about at least the courtesy of opening an email before deleting it. If still not understanding this far, then your simply one discrete dumbass or little prick, too clueless to remember we have no idea if you’re headless body butt ugly UB2 no longer seeking the same, a face pic. As a picture is worth a thousand words; then it’s the facepic that completes the sentence.
At least you can do, don’t add to the problems, complaining without completing your sentences first. My advise; unlock then delelet or just shut the fuck up. That just being another worthless hypocrite; no doubt an activist for end of DADT who probably wouldn’t have joined the military anyway. Just wanted the rights/respects that will now come a litlle less harder but still an uphill fight .
Now for a little humor. Once upon a time, came upon a MH pic different than all the others; just one unlocked. Wasn’t a high tall seeing no chin. Nor one wasting the time of those needing to know, “How hung?” Kinda odd seeing one pic only headless in a Speedo. Gets better. One word only in his profile; PARTICULAR!
Seeing only one chance, I went for the head. It’s not how often you say no! It’s how often your say yes!
Ya stil’a slut!
Got deleted without even opening my email first.
Believe we have which came first here; you know, chicken or the egg!
Except in this case, Jon, why meth heads weren’t always meth heads. Pretty sure someone gave them a good reason first! Any ideas, Jon?