ANTM: Smile And Pose

Tyra Banks has never been one to shy away from important issues. Previous cycles of America's Next Top Model highlighted topics such as global warming, racial issues and bastardizing the English language. Her talk show addresses body image, abuse and even the gay-for-pay phenomenon. And now? She's stepping out against knockoff handbags.

The theme of this week's ANTM photo shoot was "faux fashion". Before the cameras began to toll, Jay Manuel placed himself atop his soapbox to explain the extreme dangers of fake Kate Spade purses. Gasp! The fashion industry is losing money. Perhaps they should cry all over their luxurious fur coats? Look, I don't mean to take people losing their jobs lightly, but it seemed pretty ridiculous for the show to get on a moral high horse about this.

What was even more infuriating was that the shoot didn't even convey this message. It seemed as if it was a celebration of NYC's vibrant street culture, where you can get a designer bag and some brightly colored tights without busting your budget. Contradictory much?

Earlier in the episode, the remaining nine girls roleplayed with photographer and panel member Nigel Barker.This mostly resulted in blatant sexual harassment. They also posed for a mini-shoot with comedian Ross Matthews. But let's get to the important part–who was eliminated? Click through to find out!

– Dewitt

Photo credit: Barbara Nitke/The CW

To view this week's rankings, follow the JUMP:

AND NUMBER ONE THIS WEEK…

1. ANGELEA (LW – 7): First off, I just want to dedicate a big "fuck you" to all the haters who are saying Angelea doesn't look "feminine enough" in this picture. This shoot was intended to speak out against faux fashion, not make it seem glamorous and stylish. Even the judges seemed to have forgotten this! Angelea's shot highlights the tackiness of what she's wearing, while telling a story about the person who's wearing it. Even if I'm one-hundred percent positive that she wasn't trying to demonstrate this, it's still my favorite image from the bunch.

Angelea started this competition as the token bitch, and then she emerged from her cocoon as this lovable, awkward creature. Like, did she seriously make cat claws at Tyra during the judging session? I think she may have taken the definition of fierce a little too literally.

2. JESSICA (LW – 7): Angelea may have owned the photo shoot, but Jessica owned this entire episode. In fact, the title of this episode should have been changed from "Smile And Pose" to "Jesssica Wins Everything And Swallows Everyone With Her Twat". She won the posing challenge, took the prize for best picture and sexually harassed Nigel Barker. I'm not even kidding on that last part. She was vehemently trying to get him out of his pants, even if she'd claim it was just "acting".

3. KRISTA (LW – 8): If I'm being completely honest with myself, Krista isn't just in the number three position by default. It seems like they gave her a behind-the-scenes makeover, because she looked fabulous in this episode. In other words, she looked nothing like herself. I'm not crazy about the mannequin-esque vibe of this pose, but the emptiness works within this theme.

4. BRENDA (LW – 2): Brenda's picture is nowhere to be found on the internet. When the photos leaked prior to the episode's airdate, some folks speculated that she was sent home before the shoot. This obviously wasn't the case. My sneaking suspicion is that the producers didn't want us to get a closer look at her picture. Without exerting much effort, she turned out a shot that was on par with the top two (if not better). UPDATE: Photo has now been added.

5. RAINA (LW – 1): There's been all this douche-baggery on the web surrounding Raina's "rectangular body". This cattiness was triggered by viewers getting a peek of her lingerie-clad body on the set of the challenge. While I don't support this kind of judgment, it's led me to give up on Raina's chances of winning this competition. 

6. ALASIA (LW – 5): "OMG, she lifted her leg and looked down! This picture will revolutionize the entire modeling industry and inevitably stop the apocalypse from happening." That's not an exact quote from the judges, but it's along the lines of what they were thinking. I'd like Alasia a lot more if she wasn't so oddly praised week after week. When will she actually impress me?

7. ALEXANDRA (LW – 4): I wanted to make Alexandra happen for so long, solely based on her competitive spirit, in-your-face confidence and ability to ignore her status as a plus-size model. The harsh reality of the matter is that she doesn't have much "model" in her at all. She still has a chance to step up her game, but I will tell you upfront… this woman is not the winner.

8. ANSLEE (LW – 9): When I first saw this picture, I squealed in delight thinking, "There's no way the judges can spin this! This is an awful picture, and they have to acknowledge that." Turns out I was completely wrong. Despite the fact that there's a complete lack of energy and you can't see her face or eyes, the judges were all about this shot. I've stopped trying to predict their reactions, because this is just batshit insanity. This picture is ugly. Beyond ugly. It's Oogly Fugface the Third, and this bitch should have gone home this week.

GONE… TATIANNA (LW – 3): You know I loved Tatianna, so it obviously hurt to witness her early departure. But as my television screen showcased her portfolio, I started to feel better about her elimination. Even her "good shots" were only decent by modeling standards, and if her film was as bad as Tyra made it out to be, it made sense for the judges to send her home.

BONUS: Remember when Naduah chattered on about how she did a nude photo shoot with her husband, and our reaction was along the lines of, "Yeah right! And I suppose Gianni Versace rose from his grave to singlehandedly design you a pair of pajamas"? Well, it turns out that she wasn't completely crazy. 

FUN FACT: Seven out of the nine remaining girls have a name ending with the letter "A".