Solo Artist: Maskurbate’s Jake Is Your Private Dancer

A confession: I used to think Maskurbate was pretty ridic. And yes, this is from someone who recently celebrated the release of a gay porn parody of Star Wars: The Force Awakens (hey, I’m a geek and muscle-cubby Aspen really does it for me). It seemed very-50 Shades of Gay to me. However, watching the […]


Maskurbate Is 10 Years Old And They’re Giving You A Gift!

It’s Maskurbate’s birthday, yet YOU’RE getting the gift. Weird. Ugh, this means I’M old. Maskurbate is celebrating their 10th anniversary! That’s a lot of seriously sexy dudes in masks jerking off and getting groped. As they put it, the site’s got “290+ exclusive videos, 270+ photosets, 100+ amateur cocks and ten years of masked muscle!” […]


We Need to Talk About Maskurbate

This is weird, haunting, and weird.   I keep trying to come up with something I can say about this scene from Maskurbate released the first part of this month, and ending up with nothing. Here’s what the site said about this release:   Unmasked and live, Junior delivers a very sensual performance on Montreal’s […]


Quickie: Brad Strokes His Fat, Uncut Dick For Maskurbate

Last month, Maskurbate celebrated the new year by inviting back fan-favorite Brad, and since I am literally the worst human being in the whole world, I neglected to inform you about his foreskin, his meaty thighs and the 18 pounds of muscle he’s put on to his body since his last appearance on their site. Can […]


Good News! The New Maskurbate Scene Is NOT Racist.

Remember that time Maskurbate released a totally racist threesome? If not, head over here for a reminder! The scene in question featured two Black models breaking into exclusive model Manuel Deboxer‘s house, only to force him into a sexual situation when he emerges from the shower to catch them in the act. It was arguably the […]


Oral Only: Pascal From Maskurbate Is The Luckiest Cocksucker Alive

Imagine a world where it was part of your job to orally service muscular, well-endowed strippers and porn stars. When you’re done merely imagining such a world, you may then move on and proceed to be insanely jealous of Maskurbate‘s resident cocksucker Pascal. You’ve likely seen him down on his knees a million times before, […]



Bromo’s Got The Latest Horror Movie Porn Parody And It’s A (S)Cream

The fuck action is hot but the killer should murder Tom Faulk’s terrible hair. Gay porn vampire spoofs for October are SO over. This week, it’s all about adding dueling dicks to slasher flicks! The first part of Bromo’s “Cream For Me: An XXX Parody” takes Wes Craven’s (R.I.P.) beloved Scream and adds two dudes […]


Jack-U-Back

Featuring those weird dudes at Maskurbate.   This scene is literally just a prolonged commercial for the Jack-U-Back masturbation machine from Fort Troff, and it’s pretty fuckin great. I love anything that facilitates masturbation (plz to see my shopping list from Things 4 Fun) so I’m very seriously considering getting one of these jack off […]


Twins! Sort Of!

It’s confusing.   Continuing their larger series of “what on earth did I actually just watch,” Maskurbate released a scene last week featuring one guy! In a jack off race with himself! Pretending to be his own twin! It’s! More convoluted than necessary!     From the guy behind the masks, Pascal:   I’ve been dreaming […]